I’m just feelin’ real blah right now. Not happy, not sad, not really anything. It’s rather depressing. I was acting like an ass to some of my friends on msn tonight, and flirting with strangers. God, I don’t even know what the fuck is wrong with me. School is shit right now. I wish all my schools’ computers would get fucked up over night, and the whole system wouldn’t work for months; and the Tech people can’t fix it, so school would be out for a while. (Kind of stupid, really, considering I do home schooling, but yeah I really wish it’d happen right now). I was being mean to one of my best friends for no apparent reason, but it’s a good thing he didn’t catch on to my bitchiness. I should have said sorry before he left. I will tomorrow, though. What else? Hmm, I can’t get a bunch of songs out of my mind. It’s like my head just developed its own remixes of D12’s ‘How Come’, Jay-Z/Linkin park’s 99 problems, and a bunch of other shit. Its so retarded. I fell asleep in the washroom. lmao. I was just sitting down on the edge of the bathtub, and realized 15 min later, I’ve been sleeping. What the fuck. I should sleep now, but I don’t really want to…Godd, I keep thinking about all the fucked up shit I got to do still. The list never ends. I’ve got two choices here: a) either mope around all day and complain and do nothing about it; thus, eventually getting me kicked out of school. Or I could sit my ass down, and actually do all the shit I’m supposed to. Choice (a) sounds so much more appealing right now. I just don’t give a fuck anymore. I want to fail. I want to be seen as stupid so people don’t give me responsibility, or depend on me so much. Sometimes I really wish I could just leave everything, walk out the door, and never look back. I know running away doesn’t help anything, but at least I could start over, and do things right for once. Oh boy, here I go again, it’s the fuckin pity party for me, and everyone who’s reading this is invited. Fuck me. Goddamn it, I never have anything positive to say. You see, whoever’s reading this (if anyone’s reading this) this is the exact reason why I started this diary thingy. I can complain to no one in particular and not have to answer to anyone. Not to mention, my friends don’t need to hear any of this shit. It’s pretty pathetic that I can’t even finish my shit, but to complain about it when it’s my fault to begin with? Fuck me. So that’s about all the bullshit I got to say tonight. I’d write more, but it would just be more ranting and raving from the year’s biggest bitch. I’m out