It sucks when you care about people so much. You invest yourself in them way too much, and then you end up getting disappointed and hurt when they don’t reciprocate the same sort of caring towards you. It really does hurts. You know when you read about emotional pain, you think “yeah, that doesn’t really happen. It doesn’t hurt like how he’s describing” but then when you go through it yourself, you realize it does really physically hurt. Like…your chest feels heavy, you have trouble breathing, and your head just hurts. Is it really such a bad thing to want to know if you did leave, that people would miss you? The whole time you think you’ve got this great relationship going on with a couple of your friends, and you’d dead sure they’d miss you or ask about you if they hadn’t seen or spoken with you in a week. But then you come back, and no one’s really noticed. I'm so sick and tired of this. I love and care so much about you and you don't even notice. You don't care about me not even 10% as much as I do you. Its stupid to keep on loving someone like this. All this wasted care and emotion and shit. I wish I just didn't give a shit like you did. You know, if I could stop feeling this, I would. I'd rip out the part of me that does keep caring. So fucking stupid, really. You even tell me to stop caring. Why can't I? Goddamn it.