I hate painting. I want to stop taking it but I won't get my university entrance if I do. I love painting but I hate the class. I hate trying to paint Monet's fucking waterlillies, even though they're beautiful. I want to paint the way I always do, not copying the work of somebody else. I don't want to play in Rockquest. Its too stressful and my stage fright is too bad. But I'll let everyone down if I back out now. But I'll let them down if I stay too. Emma is grumpy. =( I miss the times when we were happy.