So. I'm stuck thinkin that there are no such things as soulmates. Honestly. And if there are, if there's a girl out there that was built for me, strictly for me, then the odds are she's either hundreds of miles away, or i've met her and she's already killed herself. Where would I start looking for someone of that stature? How would i even begin searching? Where am i supposed to find a girl that matches me perfectly? Where's the cynical pothead with the erratic urge to have sex and play video games? How can i start that conversation? "Hi i'm Rob, Do you happen to like getting high drinking jack daniels and watching sportscenter?" Who out there is on my fucking quote unquote wavelength? I know im fucking insane, but who isin't? I just can't hide my shit as well as yall. I guess i just fail in showing anyone that i love them, maybe i'm not able to love anyone. I guess that's why I can't seem to hold any kind of relationship. Every 'relationship' i've had has ended on some sort of bullshit. Out of the about 14 or so chicks i've dated, about 5 of them ended based on mutual hatred. Others ended because of location, coworker intercourse (HAH), or "I CANT BELIEVE YOU FUCKED HER". It's all semi-circumstantial bullshit. I dont understand how chicks stay with husbands who beat them, lie, cheat and disrespect them, but i'm stuck in my rut. I guess it just falls into the failure lifestyle that i've become so comfortable in. I just want someone who i can wake up next to when i'm 50 and still love her the same way i did when i was 20. I want someone to take care of, someone to call my own. Am i too young to be thinking about this type of shit, or is this seriously the key to my unhappiness? Hopefully Canadian chicks are more tolerable to my imperfections. Fuck.