it really ruins the rest of my day when i unwillingly break down on the freeway during morning rush hour traffic and i can't hide my sobbing from cars stopped next to me.

the looks i get are condoling, shocked, sympathetic, curious. i try to calm down, or at least hide that i'm crying uncontrollably, but i just couldn't stop.

and so even when i'm resenting you, i'm wondering if you'd be happy to know you brought me to this or if you'd finally feel sorry.

please don't tell me it doesn't matter either way.