So three months from tomorrow I'll be married. Weird, huh? :) I'm pretty excited. It's like the fourth week of the semester. TGIF. I'm fucked. Seriously ... I had a breakdown on Monday and skipped three of my classes. Jesse says it's not really a good idea to start crying in a law enforcement class, in front of your professor and 45 guys. Yeah, I guess ... but I still hate skipping. It was probably for the best; I couldn't stop crying for like an hour. Jesse took me home and we just laid on the bed together while I bawled my eyes out. I'm way too stressed. So maybe I'll keep writing. Or maybe it will just be this one entry. But I am a complete basketcase between my final semester in college, a part-time job as a parking supervisor, planning a wedding, and then my mom competing for the "worst-mother-in-law-of-all-time" prize.

So I thought I'd try this whole sitDiary thing again. It's been three months today that I started dating Jesse. When things are bad, I usually need to write. Since March 1st, I haven't needed to ... I had a p&p journal before then and that's pretty much the day I stopped. Now that we're engaged, I'm generally happy and not too stressed, but lately people's expectations about the wedding have been grating on my nerves. We both want something small and simple. I keep joking with Jesse about just eloping. It is really a joke, but part of me wishes getting married was just that easy ... I don't want all the bells and whistles; they don't mean anything to me. I'm more looking forward to what happens AFTER you get married ... you know, the "living happily ever after" part, so to speak. I guess I'd like to keep up this writing thing just to bitch about what everyone else wants and how that's not what we want. And talk about how awesome it is being engaged. :)

One of my New Year's resolutions is to start writing again, and by writing I mostly mean the whole diary thing, as well as poetry and all that jazz. So here I am, trying to overcome my OCD tendencies enough to ignore the previous entries. We'll see. A little backstory: Jacob asked me out during finals week, so we've been hanging out and going on dates since then, which was about three weeks ago. Our first "official" date was last Saturday, during which we ate Mexican food, went sledding, and watched Saw II in his room. First kiss = amazing. His ex didn't have a fucking clue what she was talking about, even if she and I do have the same name. :) So I spent tonight with Jacob at his cousin Allan's house. The three of us played cards and watched TV, then toasted each other with sparkling grape juice at midnight. Jacob drove me home, and we drove around for a little while before he actually took me home, which is when he asked me to officially be his girlfriend. What a night!

Tomorrow is the big day. It's hard to believe that the time has come already. I'm taking my road test tomorrow. I was expecting to wait another year, but my mom bought her car on Monday so I've got this week only. It's funny how when you've waited so long for something it's like a dream when it actually happens. While you're waiting it seems like forever, but when it's actually here that time fades away and you haven't really been waiting that long. I've waited a little over four years longer than most of my peers and it was worth every second. I just hope I pass!

Last night was awful. I had been doing okay, studying for my health practical, writing my speech on George W. Bush for public speaking, and I even made cookies and watched Titanic. Then Neil called. It started off as a great conversation, talking about cooking for one and how much it sucks, and my classes and his internship and how we should both work in the same city next summer. But then we got to talking about my major. Basically Neil was just giving me the same shit my parents give me about not knowing what I'm going to do with it yet, although my parents wisely stopped trying to talk about it after a few times. It's not like I haven't thought about it before. Remember live for today? It stresses me out so much when I do think about it that I should just take it one day at a time. Look at me two years ago. There were so many things different about my career path. I just didn't want to talk about it because I'm worried too, but he didn't need to know that. I did my practical for health today. My partner Sarah had embedded a screwdriver in her right forearm. I'm just glad I didn't get the car accident! Lucky for her, though, I got to be a car accident victim. Josh and Cassandra brought me to their apartment tonight for ice cream. We had chocolate strawberry sundaes, which were amazing, and we played Phase 10. Me and Cassandra tied to win. I haven't spent time with them in awhile. Neil's for sure coming home this weekend, and we're planning to take Tony's son fishing. Tony works for Neil's parents; I met him last weekend after the church rummage sale.

I went to church this morning at 8:00. Paulsons weren't there; they showed up later for the meeting and the 10:00 service. During that time I went to Dunn Bros with my mom and took my health test online. It went alright. I ended up with a 92% on it. Neil called after church and I came over to help with the kitchen. They were still wiring the lights, so I didn't do much. Neil did fix the sprinkler with epoxy though, so that was fun. Neil and I went for a walk into the woods behind his house, by the creek. I got bitten by every single mosquito in the state of Minnesota, I swear. My arms are covered with bites, there are a few on my feet and legs and even some near the waistband of my jeans. It was worth it though. :) I took a hot shower, so the bites don't itch too much. I left for Mankato at about 18:00. Neil was going to play 4-H softball at 19:00, and I was bummed because I've never missed a game that he's played in. He ended up not playing and headed back to Ames. I miss him so much already. Hopefully he comes home next weekend; he hasn't decided yet. Otherwise I won't see him until Independence Day.

I woke up at about 4:00 to a tremendous crash and my mom screaming at the bathroom door. My dad had gotten up to go to the bathroom and passed out. He was disoriented and kept trying to get up and go back to bed; all tolled he fainted five times. Not gonna lie, it was scary. We took Dad over to Mayo anyway to see that since he had already prepared for the surgery, if there was any chance that they would still go through with it. The surgeons decided against it and sent Dad to St. Mary's for emergency care and evaluation. At St. Mary's they admitted him overnight for "observation" and ran every test they had studied in medical school. Between the two hospitals, we spent about eight hours there. Thanks goodness I'm not pre-med. Hospitals wear me out. I know if I become a cop I'll spend my fair share of time in hospitals, but still. Even being in one makes me feel ill enough to be there, if that makes any sense. There were a few funny incidents while at the hospital. The doctors who referred us to St. Mary's advised Dad not to eat before he was evaluated, but me and Mom were starving as well, so as soon as we got to the emergency room we got granola bars and coffee out of the vending machines in the lobby. Dad was watching us eat them and he said in this small voice, "Can I just hold food? I can't eat it, but I just wanna hold it." Which sent me and my mom into gales of laughter. Then the nurse sent my dad into a room and told him to get into the hospital gown. He changed, then we all waited for someone else to come tell us what was going on. A man came in and asked us what was going on, and my dad said, "I don't know; the nurse just told me to come in here and take off my clothes!" The man said, "Those lousy nurses! All they do is tell you to take off your clothes." We all had a good laugh over that.

Today was the beginning of my long weekend. I gave my speech about banning fireworks, took a test in Diversity, and we starting practicing first aid on each other in health. I was paired with a boy in my class I didn't know, but we were both good sports about it. I have very low blood pressure, so when he tried to take mine he got a number so low he was sure that he was doing it wrong. My poor partner. :) Then we acted out scenarios as if we were first responders, so of course we had to bandage each other, splint limbs, do a head-to-toe examination, etc. Basically, invade each other's personal space bubble. With a head-to-toe, you essentially feel the person's body, searching for injury, from "head" to "toe." (Obviously.) So at the end of class, my partner sticks out his hand. "Now that I've felt you up, my name's Blake," he said, grinning. I laughed. "I'm Rachel." After classes were over, I called up Patrick and asked if he wanted to get together and hang out. He didn't have a car, so he rode his bike to campus. We spent an hour and a half in the basement of the PA, just talking about everything. Music, college, friends, music, parents, cancer, music, music, etc. We reminisced about music camp a lot! It is how we met, after all. Something Patrick said that struck a chord (no pun intended!) with me: "Those were the best memories of my life." I'll elaborate that in my private entry later. After awhile we decided to walk to the Hub in University Square to get coffee. Apparently Patrick and I have very similar tastes as far as coffee goes! We both can drink it any time of day, we're both known for our coffee addictions, and we both agree that Kwik Trip has the best coffee, despite the fact it's a gas station. Who knew? By the time we walked back to MSU and Patrick left, we had spent three hours together! I had forgotten how much I love that boy. The last time we saw each other was over Christmas break, freshman year (about a year and a half ago). My mom came to pick me up and I drove home. My parents spent most of the day at Mayo in a class that was supposed to prepare them for my dad's surgery tomorrow. I spent the better part of the night scrapbooking and watching a movie. I've got to go to bed early; tomorrow is going to be long. :(

So the title means, rather appropriately, "storm and longing" in German. Storm. I had been sitting in my room alternately studying for Diversity, writing my fireworks position statement for speech, and watching episodes of NCIS to relieve stress. Neil called, so I decided to go for a walk to take a break, stretch my legs and get out of my dorm room. Good plan, huh? Well, it's been grey and windy all day, so I figured I would be alright, as long as I took my raincoat. I was all the way down the sidewalk and in the Crawford parking lot when the tornado sirens went off. Cue me: "Oh shit! Shit!" Neil says, "Is that the . . . tornado siren?" "Screw taking a walk! I'm going downstairs," I said, running back into the building. I found Heidi and Carissa in the lobby. "Call me back when it's over," Neil said, and we hung up. I wish I'd had my notes with me. It was hot and humid in the basement corridor by the laundry room. Carissa tried to quiz me since she took Diversity last semester, but we didn't get too much done. We just talked about law enforcement classes and how summer is going. The warning passed at about 20:45, so I went back to my room. If it goes off again, I'm bringing my Diversity notes with me! Longing. I called Neil back after the tornado warning passed. I'm so excited to see him this weekend! He told me that his family is celebrating Father's Day on Saturday. They're going to the Hubble House in Mantorville, then heading to Rochester to pick out lights since they're remodeling their kitchen. Funny. I thought I'd get to stay in Owatonna on Saturday. Even if I don't go with them (it's up in the air; Neil hasn't asked them about me going yet), I'll probably end up at Mayo all day with my parents. I'm not sure though. I feel like no matter how many times I go to family functions with them, I'm not welcome. It would be easier if Brian were there. But I don't think he's coming home. I think the reason Brian makes me feel like I belong but not Neil is because Neil treats me like a girlfriend (which is as it should be) but Brian treats me like a sister. It makes it easier to act like I belong, and acting like it convinces me that I actually do belong.

Rockin' in the Quarry was a success. It didn't rain (though it threatened to all afternoon), and the sun even came out near the end. I enjoyed it, not nearly as much as I did in '05 (my first Quarry), but it was a little sad as well because this is supposedly the last Quarry concert. Ten years of an amazing tradition that the public loves, then we get new management and everything goes down the tubes. This is me, shaking my head. I don't know what I'm going to do about MSO next year. Luckily, I have the whole rest of the summer to figure it out. I went out for Katie J.'s 21st birthday to Pub500 with a group of people. Juwon was her designated driver. I suddenly realized that I had a speech midterm due the next morning though, so I had him drive me back around 23:00. I'm glad I went with them, though. I cleared up some questions Juwon had about Amy and how she's a "professional liar" - his words, not mine. I think I just blew that shit wide open for him though. I'm sure I'm going to have an explosion on my voice mail later. Oh well. He deserves to know what he got himself into. I also got to talk to Joe F. again, which was cool. I haven't seen him since music history was over a month ago. Turns out he's going to be in my music theory class in the fall. Awesome. Juwon and Joe had to deal with me on a caffeine high or something like it. I think I was acting like I would if I was drunk. I've never been drunk, so I wouldn't know, but I was getting kinda crazy, and I was letting myself. Katie seemed to be holding her alcohol well. Near the end Eric and Jerusha came, so I talked to them a little bit. Maybe Eric and I will actually come to rehearsals for MSU orchestra on the same days next fall!

I woke up at 11:00. Yeah. I never sleep in that late, but it's been a while since I've had the chance. The only productive things I did today were go to MSO rehearsal and walk to Kwik Trip. MSO was alright; the music's easy so my wrists don't kill and Michelle's mom made us all egg rolls, which were awesome. I bought whole milk at Kwik Trip. Screw the extra dime and thirty calories. I talked to one of the guys from my Diversity class for a bit today. His name is Matt. It's interesting to see how other people got into law enforcement and where they came from. I knew he was in the Army, but it was just interesting to talk to him a little more. He invited me to join him and a few of our classmates in the library after class to study sometime. I told him I'd consider it. I didn't know he was living on campus this summer; most of the older students don't. Not that he's old. But I've heard when you've been out in reality before coming back to college, usually living in the dorms is a pain. But if it works, hey . . . all the power to him. I'm not mad at Neil. Not really. I hope he calls me back. I'm not holding my breath.

So all I've been doing this week is bitching about how stressed out I am, and now, on Friday night, which is a chance for me to relax and unwind and do nothing and enjoy doing nothing, instead I piss and moan about how bored I am and how lame it is that all I did tonight was go for a walk by myself, then spend 3+ hours reading Harry Potter fanfiction. What a waste. It's not like I had anything better to do. Neil didn't call. I've had to call him the past two days anyway and he didn't seem like he wanted to talk, so I'll just wait for him to do it. He'll call when he wants to talk. Until then, I'm lonely. I hope he's having a better Friday night than I am, but if he's drinking all bets are off. My parents put Gus down this morning. It will be a little strange to go home and not have the gates up in the kitchen, not have to deal with the barking and yelling and the baby food in the microwave. We all knew it was coming. It's been fifteen years. Most of my life. He was an annoying dog for the most part, but it's still gonna feel empty without him underfoot. Sleeping in, homework, studying, and orchestra rehearsal tomorrow. Fun? . . . No. Lame. I hate summer school. I want to go home. I want everything to be right again.

I didn't do much today, and it felt good. I finally got through the homework that would never end. At least most of it. I made shortbread and watched episodes of NCIS, season 2. Tomorrow is Friday, and that's a relief. Finally. I know I have Rockin' in the Quarry, but still. It's a weekend. The only one I'm not spending at home. Two weeks from now I'll be home for good this summer. Hard to believe it's already halfway over. I know I've said that before. Some days go so fast, and others crawl by, usually proportionate to the amount of homework I have. So I've been stressed lately. Now that I've got things under control, I'm better. Hence the public entry. :) "& everything is easier than I had guessed everything would be; even remembering the way who looked at whom first e.e. cummings

I don't know if I'm going to make it through these next three weeks. I keep telling myself it's just three weeks; that's almost the only thing that keeps me going. I have so much to do. Today we finally managed to get together for our mocktail party. At around 17:00, Kimberly and I went to Katie's apartment, where we met up with Katie, Cassandra and Juwon. We made strawberry daiquiris and pina coladas. We took a lot of silly pictures and a crazy video. I had refreezable plastic ice cubes, and we ended up having an ice cube fight with them. Katie took video of it; hopefully she puts it up on Facebook. :) I had MSO rehearsal tonight for the Quarry concert next weekend. I love the music and the musicians, and getting paid is always a perk, but I don't know if I like where MSO is going next year. I don't agree with some of the choices whoever's in charge has made, and part of me wants to leave because of them. I don't know. It's like what Mr. Gitch said about Varsity Orchestra all those years ago: "We play because we can't imagine not playing." I feel like who I am, the self at my core, is diminished somehow if I'm not involved in an orchestra. Just thinking about dropping out of MSO is painful. I miss chamber music as well, like Dinner Ensemble and being in a quartet or a trio. I love being the spine of a small group like that. I remember one time at St. Olaf, we had quartet rehearsal at 22:00 on a Thursday, which was my hardest and longest day, and all I could do was bitch about having to be there. What's wrong with complaining about one rehearsal, when you have three more years of countless rehearsals left, with the same people, same place, same coach? I wonder what I would have done, had I known that would not be the case. It seems to be a trend with me; I always regret not living in the moment. So let this be a reminder to myself and anyone else who may read this: Live now. This is it.

I spent this weekend at home. Each time it gets harder to come back to Mankato. I'm so sick of school and being away from everyone and everything I love. Neil came home this weekend as well; I didn't know he was going to until Friday afternoon, and I didn't know when he was coming back into town so I didn't hold out for Friday night plans. At about 22:00, my cell phone rang. "So, I got directions to the house of the most beautiful girl in the world, and now I'm standing in her driveway." I go outside, and sure enough there is my wonderful boyfriend. We went back to his house and watched "Next". I've seen it before, but it was good the second time around too. Riding to his house felt like going back in time, to high school, because it was just like when he would pick me up on a Friday night, taking 18th St. just like we always did, holding my hand between the seats and listening to the same country radio. Sometimes I look at Neil now though, and I see him as he is today. I still can't believe he's nineteen already. An engineering major at a tiny college in Boston. He's going places. I'm so proud of him, but it scares me a little that he might outgrow the small-town, good-ole-boy that I am so madly in love with. It's funny how when we've known someone for a long time, we see them as they were when we first met them, and in a way I still see Neil as the fifteen-year-old I first met. My scrawny, nerdy standpartner who wore Hawaiian shirts and helped me with my math homework, then talked on the phone until it was late. Back to my weekend . . . on Saturday I went to Peter's grad party. I'm so proud of him as well. My dad said he thinks Peter is one of the most decent guys I've ever known, and I would definitely agree. Peter's party was quite popular, but he spent a lot of time talking to me. Every time I see him, I miss him more when we part. Sometimes I wonder what could have been, you know? I will say that my high school experience would have been lessened without Peter in it, and I'm so thankful to have known him. I'm sure I'll see him this summer, and maybe on breaks next year, but still. I'm going to miss this. We just look good together. It was even a good hair day for me. Last night, I went over to Neil's house to hang out again and we watched half of "P.S. I Love You" before Neil couldn't stand it anymore. He took me home and we sat in my driveway for awhile before I went in. He was really tired, more tired than he should have been, and he has been all weekend. I'm a little worried about him. Today I had planned on going trapshooting in the morning, but I admit, I wanted to see Neil again, and I haven't been to church in ages. I love my home church. Some people don't like the traditional Lutheran service, but I love it. They say the ritual is meaningless because of its repetition, but to me it's comforting. I think if heaven is eventually going to be my home, I want it to be as comfortable as going home to Our Savior's in Owatonna. I ate at Kernal with my mom and looked at the Sunday People's Press, as usual. I love looking at the engagements and doing the crossword. I feel like the main character in "27 Dresses"; the first thing she does when she rips open the paper is look at the wedding page. I spent a few hours of the afternoon at Neil's house. He slept for a lot of it. I didn't think much of it at the time; he takes naps and sleeps a lot on a regular basis. But fast forward to about 20:00, when he's back in Ames and I'm in Mankato. I'm done grocery shopping and everything. I was talking to Brian, but when Neil called, I switched it over and Neil told me he was bored and starting to get sick for real. I mean, he's been kinda sick with a cold for two weeks, and he gave it to me the first Wednesday he came over to see me, so like a week and half. I'm still feeling it too, but he's thinking he's going to start throwing up and feeling awful, the whole shebang. I really hope he doesn't. This internship is really important to him, and I hate knowing that he's feeling badly and I can't do anything to make him feel better. Here's to two more weeks before I see Neil again, to both of us surviving those two weeks (in more ways than one), and here's to a few good men (Neil and Peter).

Yesterday I tried to study all day, but I managed to keep getting sidetracked. I made bread pudding (successfully!) and it was awesome. I kept getting phone calls from my parents and Neil, so I answered those. I watched two or three episodes of Life online. Very unproductive. I need to practice so badly. I know I could; I just keep making excuses. Today I'm killing some time between classes being over and going home this afternoon. I need to do laundry, take a shower, make food, and maybe do homework if I'm so inclined. I know I'll study for health on the drive home. I have a few worksheets for Diversity, maybe I'll work on those now and think of three topics for speech. And maybe I'll take Hot Fuzz home and watch it tonight while scrapbooking! Which reminds me, we'll probably stop at Hobby Lobby before we leave Mankato. And that's kind of over by Dunn Bros. Yay! I hope I can keep my focus for the rest of the term. It's only three more weeks; yikes! It seems like I still have so much work to do, but I'm already almost half done.

Today was rough. I'm still in the middle of being sick, so that in itself was sucky. Then I had to give my farming speech this morning at 7:30. The speech went alright. I'd say about average compared to everyone else in the class. As good as I could expect since I wrote it last night and my state of health. We had our lecture on AEDs in health today. At least we got out early so I came back to my room, responded to my email, Facebooked, and uploaded my pictures from the cabin. Then I went to Diversity for my first test. I didn't study as much as I should have for it, but by this point I just wanted to go back to my room, curl up and watch NCIS and eat oatmeal (one of my comfort foods). Which I did after the test. It wasn't so bad. I spent more time on it than I usually do because I'm a really fast test-taker (which can be a bad thing), but I think I did okay. Not fantastic, but I don't think I failed it. Hopefully. I sorted out my drama with Amy and Juwon over the phone today. He was in Owatonna. I wasn't too surprised; for some reason they thought I would be but I explained that Brian had told me everything. Then I went shopping with Kimberly. She bought a fridge for her room, which is exciting. We ate at Panera (our usual dining spot), went grocery shopping at Wal-Mart and Cub, then stopped at Dunn Bros for hot tea (for me) and a smoothie (for Kimberly). After a few guys from her work helped Kimberly move her fridge from her car to H-3, I went with them to I-3 to play board games. Even though I'm not one of their co-workers, they were okay with it, and it was kinda fun. I'm just glad I didn't have homework tonight. We played Monopoly. I had to leave early since I wanted to get to bed at a reasonable hour, so I "left my money to charity" (put it in the middle of the board) and left my properties in "my will" (aka, gave them to a few players around me).

I woke up this morning to find Neil spying on me. He had been watching me sleep. See, his bed was situated in such a way that if he sat at the right angle, he could see down the stairway into my bed. That loveable creeper. :) Most of the morning was spent eating breakfast and cleaning up. Neil wanted to go out fishing with his dad for a little bit, so they went out in the canoe while Barb, Jana, Brian, and I walked down to the creek. Brian brought an axe and cleared the road of branches and stuff. Then it was finally time to go. We drove to the Radfords' to return some things and the cabin keys before piling back in the van for a three-hour drive home. It ended up being more like four hours. It wasn't nearly as eventful as the drive there either. Neil and I read a little, and subtly made out in the back. :) Give us a break, we're young and in love and who knows when we'll see each other again, right? We dropped Brian off in Lakeville so he could drive back to Hutchinson in the Escort, then Neil moved up to the middle seat with a very queasy, carsick Jana. He offered it to me, saying, "Don't you want to sit next to my vomiting sister?" Jana was okay, just a little nauseous. As soon as we got back to Owatonna, we had to rush to pack the van for Neil's trip to Ames for his internship. He brought me home on his way out of town, where I had to clean up, pack up, and head back to Mankato. I wish I didn't have to go back to school and Neil didn't have this internship and we could spend the whole summer together. Logically, I know it's the right thing for both of us. But it's so hard to say goodbye sometimes. And the first few days are the hardest. I can't believe how much I took it for granted when we were in high school and saw each other every day. How long ago that seems! I'm glad we had that time together though, because without that foundation this wouldn't work. I know most people don't think we have a very strong relationship because we've broken up in the past, but in my opinion it's made us much stronger than we would be if we had stayed together. Our time apart matured us and showed us what was missing. Oh, I love that boy more each day. I miss him already! At least I'll probably see him in a little over a month.

Neil and I woke up relatively early and went out fishing in the canoe. At first I wasn't enthusiastic because I'm sick and I had just gotten up, but I caught a Northern (aka, a fish with big scary teeth)! I've never caught one before. I hope Neil was proud of me, even if he didn't catch it himself. I think he was. We came in for pancakes and later went for a walk down to the creek. It goes under the road we came in on and there's a "Beware of Troll" sign nailed to a tree near it. Neil wanted to go trout fishing later, but I wasn't feeling the greatest and the walk there and back took a lot out of me. Neil ended up napping for four hours after lunch anyway. Another potluck-type affair, this time with brats and hamburgers with onion-soup mix. After Neil woke up, the six of us split up into two teams and played Hand and Foot. I love that game! I was on a team with Brian and Rusty. We did pretty well the first two rounds, but the last one slaughtered us. At twilight, Barb and Rusty decided to go for a quick canoe ride. Neil and Brian had to run down to the dock and help, because they almost managed to tip the canoe over even before then pushed off shore. It was slightly amusing, but Neil was a little nervous. He kept saying, "Mom and Dad can take care of themselves, but I'm not sure they can take care of my canoe. If they lose it, I will be upset." After they came back, Neil and I went out. It was a little misty and getting dark fast, but the lake was still and the lit-up cabins on shore were beautiful. I got some pictures of but they didn't turn out too well. I got to learn how to paddle this weekend and put my skills to good use tonight. It was one of those moments you wish would last forever. We played whist and made s'mores before bed. Barb, Jana and I took a field trip to the outhouse too, which was kinda hilarious. We took turns holding the flashlights. We're constantly looking for the porcupine, which I'm starting to doubt exists. But I'm too wary of it to doubt completely! I'm starting to feel gross from lack of showering, but I still wish it wasn't the last night here. It's so gorgeous and fun here. And Neil's here with me. That's what matters the most.

Today we started the morning off with oven-baked French toast and coffee made by Neil's grandma Myrt. At breakfast, we were joined by Pete and Sylvia and their two daughters Audrey and Valerie. Neil's grandpa Dave told me stories in the style of older men, like the kind my dad tells. Like the story about the porcupine at the cabin who's "out to get him" and the bear who chased him until "his hat blew off and he had to leave." Neil's response when he first heard this last one was, "What kind of hat was it?" Later Neil and Brian took me into the carriage house to show me all the old furniture that their grandpa restores. We went into Cloquet to get fishing licenses and groceries. Neil and Rusty went to the bait shop while I went to Wal-Mart with Barb, Brian, and Jana because I realized this morning that I had forgotten something very important - underwear. I quickly bought some in a package. They were labeled size 6, but they're huge on me; I have to roll up the sides and they droop anyway. It's like boxer shorts for girls. But as Jana keeps reminding me, it's better than none at all! We finally got out to the cabin. Right away, Brian, Neil, and I set off in the canoe. We ended up over by another lake on the other side. We were looking at a man-made waterfall when Neil said, "I'm going to take a pee; don't follow me." That tended to be the theme of the morning. We went all around Sterle Lake. The first half was on a gravel trail that was relatively easy for walking. Then we ended up going through a swamp, during which Brian decided to take a "don't follow me" adventure in the same vein as Neil's. Some other highlights include me saying, "Swamp people are bad." There was lots of jumping over wet spots, and whoever was in front warning the others of wet spots. At one point Neil got halfway out into the swamp and started shouting, "Oh shit! Shit! Don't follow me!" There was quite a bit of swearing and muddy, soaked shoes. Brian managed to get sixty ticks on himself (we counted)! We would stop every five minutes and say, "Tick check!" I think, for some reason, ticks like guys better. I only had a few. We finally got back to the cabin, wet, tired, and hungry. There were more people at the cabin than before. Pete and Sylvia with Audrey and Valerie, the grandparents Radford as well as the grandparents Paulson. There was a potluck lunch with ham and pasta salad and fresh strawberries. In the afternoon, Neil and I tried and failed to fit both of us in the hammock, but not without a lot of hugging and laughing. Then we "went for a walk." I'll leave your imagination to figure that out. :) Going fishing in the canoe was the next thing we did. I kept getting distracted by the eagles and loons, so I didn't catch much. Neil caught a lot of perch though. I got a picture of the biggest one. Neil's highlight of the evening was foil dinners when we came back. He's been telling me about them since we started dating! Neil insisted on making mine for me so I would have a good one. It was sweet of him, and they were pretty much amazing. By then it was time to go to bed.