well today was good. i actually got sleep last night. this has literally been the worse year ever for me in school. ive changed so god damn much and i have so much drama in my life with friends and guys. i thought i found someone good for me but well he was involved with another girl and well i was used not once not twice but three times. i feel like an asshole..lol' i am an asshole. ahah. but yea i just got off the phone with my really good friend brittany. recently i lost my best friend and then i became friends with her. shes helped me alot ... b/c of her i didnt get into depression! ha yea. i can be very negative and shit. but yea she just got done lecturing me. but its ok..shes right..lol i dont take it personally i kno i have things i need to change bout myself. and thats what i intend on doing for the rest of my life is figuring out who the hell i am. but damn when you have all these problems with ppl..it can be so hard and i just want to give up. but i wont. promise. i just need not to care what others think. especially sam.haha. like i care. and i also need to show how i feel. whether i am pissed,happy,sad w.e i need to show it more often. im like a brick, hard as hell and wont break until u throw me off a really fucking high building..lol well i need to stop refering myself as a rock of some sort. yea i want to type this song in here by afi. but there are lots i want to put in here so ill do it later and o yea i need to type my song. its not done yet. only the chorus part. and soon ill be getting pics of me in here too!!! the old me is out the new me is in i dont care if you dont like it b/c from now on i dont give a shit you can hate me love me but once you look throught these hurt eyes youll see that this is what shall come of me. ta-ta jesss