For God's sake. I'm sick of losing my entries. Here's try #2, which will never be as good as try #1: I've decided to go with the format of my actual journal for this one. Consider yourselves lucky, as this is a one-time-only chance... for most of you. I've noticed lately that my mind is constantly changing about everything, so it seems senseless to express feelings which won't be there the next day. Nevertheless, it's nice to have them, and maybe even to express them, even if only for the amusement of one's future self. Today was unusual. Not in a bad way. Chorus seniors/officers visited area hospitals/nursing homes to sing Christmas carols. I mostly hung around with Oti, Ben, Rob, and Mike. I enjoyed myself so much, that I had completely forgotten about my haircut until we got back to school. That's pretty amazing, since that's all I've been able to think about for the past few days. We talked about a lot of things, including but not limited to, dead animals, haircuts (which actually didn't bother me), and St. Claire's. Okay, Ben was wearing a shirt that said St. Claire's, and this one old lady wanted him so bad, she stood up and said "St. Claire's, you're so tall. You have a wonderful voice." It's even funnier because of how red he turns when he's embarrassed. He said something in a nursing home that made me think a little. He said "I don't like it here. Look at everyone. That's gonna be us in 60 years. These people are here because their families are sick of them, and they're too old to matter." And he's right. Every single person in there was about the same. Lonely, spiteful, and a little senile. Some may not have shown it, but you just know. Imagine living in a place where it's commonplace for your best friend to die in her sleep. Where you have to abandon your old life for something much less favorable, full of people just like you. I bet it'll happen to most of us someday. I guess there's just a certain age where people lose their respect and value, and just become "old people." Heh. I guess that's how my family sees my grandpa. That's not right. I don't think it should be like that. A lot of the fault is my own. I don't treat him like family. I treat him like an old person. I even avoid him. Just because he likes Moses, I pass him off as senile. Somebody has to like Moses, and he's doing a good job. I guess I never imagined acutally being old, though. That's a whole different perspective. I don't think I want to get old. This is not where I saw my entry going, but it's not a problem. Hah.