so...my birthday is in two days. and i know that no one is ever going to read this so i can get out my feelings. im really excited to be turning 18, but now it comes with so much responsibility. i believe ive truly grown mentally since last using this. hopefully, thats what happens in age. but moreover, im not sure what my friends are going to do about it. i want a surprise, but i dont. because if i dont get one i dont want to feel like crap. that would be awful. but ive been in on a lot of my other friends suprises and i guess ive just thought about it a lot. i feel like im ruining anything that could happen by talking about it. oh well. it doesnt matter. so many more birthdays left. so its funny to see how only about 10 people are online on this thing now...when there used to be hundreds. myspace has taken over. its sad, i conformed too. but its pretty fun, i dont ask people to comment or whatever though. its really there for me, and im not putting myself out there for publicity or more friends. i enjoy the friends i have now. this is great. things are looking up for me. im going to do something about my emotions now. i think im done. now i remember why i quit this thing, it got borning. i dont need to record my every thought and feeling. only sometimes, when its needed.