I find it fascinating that my life changed for a split second, but then....its back to the same place where it was, as if these past three weeks never even happened. crazy i tell you, life is so messed up. but of course that is the highschool image. now i dont know what i feel, because things are just interesting. some people will never see all of me, only some, because im different in each situation. everyone is. in class people probably think im the semi-smart kid only because i mouth off at the teachers and im a total smart ass. but actually ive gotten really good at that, and i think kamka actually likes me now haha scary thought. anyway. drama friends think im precious, band friends look up to me(i would hope) and some people think im the biggest loser ever. and then there are the friends not in band, or drama, or ib, but are good friends, i dont know what they think of me, i guess they think im cool but im never going to be sure. its too awkward just to ask "so you think im smart funny and good looking right?" as outgoing as i am its hard to say stuff like that without having people think you are joking. thats another thing, i guess people dont know how to take me seriously because im always joking with them. ah its....yeah... ive learned a number of things from this month, crazy stuff. and i love myself for taking it smoothly, not overreacting(for too long i suppose) and just observing what life is throwing at me. im glad im going through these experiences and im understanding too. but its really hard when other people cant really cooperate with you, and you cant tell them, you cant control them. i dont really know how people see me, some think im awsome, others cute, others a jackass, but i just want everyone to know that i try to be the best person for everyone. and if im a little to friendly no one should be afraid. :)