I can't help it. I love the song.

3:38:27 am. Yeah. For real.

Today was a lazy day, so lazy that I ended up taking naps just so the day would go by quickly. But along with that, I did a lot of thinking. And now I'm on the verge of breaking down. I'm sure it'll happen soon and around people. Not that I want to. It just does. I guess it's like me reaching out for help, but rather than being civilized and appropriate, I breakdown, sob and look ridiculous.

I need to stop.

Everything's just hitting me. Slowly but hard. If that makes sense. Because if something was going to hit you, it'd have to be going at a fast pace to actually hurt right? If it was going slow, it'd feel like a heavy soft pillow. So no, not slowly but hard. But slowly and hitting all the right[or wrong] places.

Here's a shout out: I haven't done shit wrong to you and you keep going after people that will. I feel as if I'm nothing to you and that's probably true. I should walk away, but the sad thing is that even after you do get hurt, I'm still going to be here.

^ Yeah, Boy is difficult and doesn't talk. I can't really say anything.

I just realized that I'm really lonely.

A lot of people are telling me to be happy, and I understand. I'm trying. But it's a bit difficult to be happy if things keep shooting you down. But believe me, I try.