Fresh off of half an hour of standing outside in the pouring rain, locked out of my house, here's what new and fresh in my head: So i was in my local kitchen earlier this week, looking in the pantry (what the hell is a pantry anyways?) for some snackage. I came across a box of Quaker Oats granola bars, bursting with well over two fruit flavours and Vitamins A-thru-Z with tons of other nutritious shit thrown in too. Ya know, for the growing kids and their responsible mothers out there. And I picked the box up and I looked on the side of it, and it said... "If it doesn't say Quaker on the box, it's not a Quaker granola bar." And I thought to myself 'well no shit, really.' I mean, if the kind of people who are eating your product really need something like that written on the box as a guide for them, then do you really want to keep your bars wrapped in plastic? Hmm? These are the kind of people who struggle to open the plastic wrappers for half an hour and then find a way to choke on it and die- a.k.a handicapped people. Don't act like it's not funny to imagine a handicapped person jumping/wheeling around their kitchen trying to unwrap something for half an hour. So the Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants came out recently. I think Doug Benson put it best when he said in his latest movie review: "I think the Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants should get together with the Ya-Ya Sisterhood and go fuck off" hahaha. I'm tired, night.