BEST GIG EVER.

Hello tharr! So, guess where I'm gonna be tomorrow?! In Birmingham! No, I guess Birmingham isn't really something to get excited about, BUT, I'm gonna be there to watch FOALS!! AHHH! I'm actually so excited. We're leaving at around half one from Manchester Pic, and getting to Birmingham just after three! Then we check in to the hotel AAAAAND we're off to queue (like good little British queuers) so we can get somewhere near-ish the front. I swear I will elbow any motherfucker who tries to squeeze past me to the front, SQUARE IN THE FACE!

HELLO!!! :D So it's been forever! In the last year I have: - Lost 3 and 1/2 stone and kept it off - Stopped speaking to my mum - Moved to Manchester - Got a full-time job - Finished my degree - Started looking into Master's So yeah, it would've been nice to have SitDiary through all the shit but I didn't, and I could never really get used to other blogs, so I'm glad to have it back. I really am.

If I had a gun, I'd shoot a hole into the sun, And love would burn this city down for you. If I had the time, I'd stop the world and make you mine, And everyday would stay the same with you.

I have the most amazing best friend in the world. He’s my soulmate. It’s amazing knowing someone’s always going to be by your side, having someone who knows your flaws and loves them anyway, because they’re what makes you, you. I just want to say thank you, Bambi, for going out in the rain to get stuff for my sore throat, and for everything else that you do, the list is endless. I love you <3

Not fucking worth it. Just a morbidly obese, pathetic, lonely, silly girl. Who needs to leave me the fuck alone.

Things change, people change. I'm glad we've stayed the same through the ups and downs. I'm pretty sure we always will. I've never had a friend quite like you (: so I thought I'd write a lil shumthing like we used to do forever ago. I miss you, and I'm looking forward to seeing you next week, you crazzzyy chicken <3 Ps: I'm glad you got HIM :3 you deserve to be as happy as he's making you... You've been through enough and I'm glad he's there, he's your monkeyy (: Hey there Delilah here's to you, this one's for you!!!! ILY

Hello SD, it's been a while... Sooo since I've been back home, I have got a job, took me less than two weeks, and I am now employed and what not, working as a waitress for Nandos, and it's fucking hard work. I did a ten hour shift yesterday and only got one twenty minute break, but it's alright because the patrao thinks it's okay to work seven hours without a break so long as I'm let out ten minutes early! That's alriiight then, eh? Bambi has a gig today, I wish you could tag people in your posts! that would be epic. But yeah, he has a gig at facebar today (: exciting times! I finish work at five so I've just about got enough time to come home, get changed, see the new kitten (Oscar) and then go back out... Harley died just a little over two weeks ago, this house kind of died a little bit too... Everyone was really down about how much duller the house was without hiss furryness strutting around the place... So we have adopted a new kitten, not that he will ever replace Harley, but we kinda just need to be cheered up a bit, I know it sounds bad, but it isn't. We're all hurting, Harley was part of the family... And with that, I'll say goodbye! Untill next time x

Weep for yourself, my man, You'll never be what is in your heart Weep Little Lion Man, You're not as brave as you were at the start Rate yourself and rake yourself, Take all the courage you have left Wasted on fixing all the problems That you made in your own head But it was not your fault but mine And it was your heart on the line I really fucked it up this time Didn't I, my dear? Didn't I, my... Tremble for yourself, my man. You know that you have seen this all before Tremble Little Lion Man, You'll never settle any of your scores Your grace is wasted in your face, Your boldness stands alone among the wreck Now learn from your mother or else spend your days biting your own neck But it was not your fault but mine And it was your heart on the line I really fucked it up this time Didn't I, my dear? Didn't I, my dear?

I etched the face of a stopwatch on the back of a raindrop, And did a swap for the sand in an hourglass. I heard an unhappy ending, It sorta sounds like you're leaving. I heard the piledriver waltz It woke me up this morning... You look like you've been for breakfast at the heartbreak hotel, And sat in the back booth by the pamphlets and the literature on how to lose, Your waitress was miserable and so was your food, If you're gonna try and walk on water make sure you wear your comfortable shoes. Mysteries flashing amber, Go green when you answer But the red on the rest of the questionnaire never changes. I heard the news that you're planning, To shoot me out of a cannon. I heard the piledriver waltz, It woke me up this morning... You look like you've been for breakfast at the heartbreak hotel, And sat in the back booth by the pamphlets and the literature on how to lose, Your waitress was miserable and so was your food, If you're gonna try and walk on water make sure you wear your comfortable shoes. Aaah, piledriver… <3 xXx

Haii tharr sitdiarynesians. I love the gym :) I've been going a lottt AAAAND I can already tell a difference, after a week! :D! UHHMAYZIING. Having an extra easy day today. Taters and sausages for lunch (and for energy) with plenty of veg and some fruit afterwards!Theeeennn gymmygymgym from 5-7 :) yumyumyum lots of running! Haven't actually told anyone yet, so I'm gonna divulge this secret here... I wanna take part in Race for life in July, so I need to run lots, to make sure that I am in shape, and that I can actually run 5k... Apart from that, not much else to tells ya... 8) Have a good lazy sunday everyone :) ML DakkyMonster xXx

Mother, will you think of me in your prayers? This 21st century is a mess… You can try and fix it, but it breaks. You can try and love it, but it hates. Oh it hates... This is for everything we have, it's the good and it's the bad, it's the state of love and trust. And this is for you, and this is for us. Father, will you comfort me if I call? This crazy world has lost its mind, it's our fault… Oh you can try and straighten it, it turns, it turns, it turns… Oh you can try and smother it, but it burns. Oh it burns… This is for everything we have, it's the good and it's the bad, it's the state of love and trust. And this is for you, and this is for us. Oh will you break my fall, when I climb too high? I always lose my nerve, it happens every time… And will you bring me home, when I'm barely alive? It's the state of love and trust, and this is for you, and this is for us, and this is for you, and this is for us. This is for us.

Tbh, I don't really give a shit about how effective the Stanford-Binet tests are at measuring intelligence, and whether or not they should be used in the education system, so can I just go to sleep instead of doing this shitty assignment? Kthxbai. Ps: Dear Sue, your assignments suck. Sincerely, The one who falls asleep in your lectures. Oh wait... that's EVERYONE.

I never really know where I stand anymore these days. I don't know how I'm supposed to feel. I feel a little bit broken. If I don't say this now I will surely break As I'm leaving the one I wanna take Forgive the urgency But hurry up and wait My heart has started to Separate. Be my baby, I'll look after you.

Stupid wisdom tooth won't leave me alone. Today was supposed to be amazing. It was just disappointing. Whatever. I really need to get a start on my poster, especially seeing as I'm probably not going to be getting much sleep anyway. I'm just having trouble coming up with a poster title, I was thinking of something along the lines of "To what extent are IQ tests reliable and should they be banned from the Educational system?" I basically want a two part question which includes both a critical evaluation of a specific IQ test and how IQ test results should be applied in the real world, if at all. Anyway, geeking out is overrr. Anyway, just hitting you guys with an update (not in a getting-hit-on-the-face-with-a-trout kind of way)... Much love :) Ana x

Dear Bambi, Writing this note like you’re unreasonably far away from me, because you are, two metres is unreasonably far to be perfectly honest. I have absolutely loved the time we’ve spent together in the past month and a half; it was actually kind of perfect, even when it wasn’t. It’s out 55th week anniversary and I know you’re enjoying yourself with your friends, which is nice, I hope you guys have a good one. I loved that we stayed up till five last night, and just chatted, I love talking to you, but more than anything, I love the sound of your voice, it makes me feel safe, I think that’s why I find it so easy to fall asleep when you’re on the phone. You soothe me; as long as you’re there, everything is fine. You’re not here now though, and this double bed is awfully empty, I’ve put a bunch of stuffed animals and cushions down the side, but they won’t put their arm around me, or pull me really close and snuggly and kiss me on the forehead when I’m going to sleep. They won’t squish me against a corner with their bums either… You know how I feel about you; I tell you every day, you know how much you mean to me. I just thought I’d leave this note for you, just like you did for me. I love you You mean absolutely everything to me. Night baby -Ana x

First of all, hello! I would’ve posted sooner but life has been too good lately to spare a couple of minutes to write to you all about how absolutely fantastic it’s been, not really, I just get distracted. Firstly, on the first of January it was mine and Ant’s one year anniversary :) yaay! Which was celebrated by having a romantic meal, followed by the nommiest cuddles and sex! Secondly, our flatmate from hell, who moved in her morbidly obese boyfriend (he used to walk naked on the landing) and who used to leave all her shit scattered about the house, has finally moved out, she also reported us for bullying before she left, despite our many attempts to befriend her. Whatevs, haters gon’ hate. Have chopped all my long curls off, and now have a tuft of hair that doesn’t even reach my shoulders, but meh, getting used to it, plus my hair did actually really need it. Went out with the girlies tonight, and it was quite fun, spent five hours in town just shopping, have now gone into my overdraft by about 200 squid but whatevs! Student life, we’re all broke. Anyway, have another entry to write, just wanted to catch up first. ML DakkyMonster x

Happiness is not a fish that you can catch. Why must you drift through life thinking to yourself “one day, I’m going to be happy”, open your eyes, you’re wasting your time. Happiness is not a destination, it’s not a permanent state of being that you will reach eventually in life and stay there, it doesn’t work that way; happiness is an emotion. Guess what? This is your life, and sometimes it’s happy, sometimes it’s sad, sometimes it’s aggravating and other times it just downright sucks, but that’s okay! Stop taking the little things for granted, when you feel happy, cherish it, soak it all in, roll around in it, shove it in your goddamn face and say “Hello world! Today, I do not care for the shit you insist on throwing at me for I am happy”. Whatever it is that triggered it, a song, a smile, a picture, a book, it doesn’t matter, just take it, thank the magical unicorn of all things that are happy and wonderful and get on with it. I’m not saying it’s not okay to be sad, unfortunately, it’s a part of life, but stop living in this deluded fantasy that you’re making your way towards happiness, and when you reach it, it will be blissful, because it just doesn’t bloody-well happen that way. If you’re not happy about something, then change it, because just in case you haven’t caught on yet, no one else is going to change it for you. Fucking hell, if you’re short on topics to make you feel glad of the life that you have, just think back a couple of hundred years ago, when people were dying of the plague and there was no clean water to drink and freedom of speech didn’t exist, and there was no such thing as internet porn. There is a possibility that you only live once, and when you die, that’s it, finite, the end, curtain call, exit left, nothing else. If that’s the case, do you even know how lucky you are to be here in the first place? Thousands of possibilities could have played out to ensure that you were not born, and yet, here you are, reading this very journal entry. You are a lucky bastard. Don’t waste your time trying to reach something that you’re never going to get to; sometimes you’re going to be happy, sometimes you’re not. The mother-fucking end. Much Love DakkyMonster

29/11/2010 04:42 AM I should probably be writing my essay, but I just cannot seem to properly get into it! IT'S SNOWING!!! Bambi's going tomorrow ): not looking forward to that what-so-ever. Gonna miss having him to chat to, he really is my best friend, and right now, pretty much the only person I actually talk to, just sort of want to go upstairs and give him some cuddles, can't believe I'm spending out last night together for a while, sat on a sofa writing an essay... I think that as soon as I get all this info typed up, I'll go sit next to him and finish my essay there, where I'm all cozy and happy :) Hopefully, Bambi'll get facebook back soon, because all the posts he ever wrote on my wall got deleted with his account ): and I can't see them until he re-activates it! Plus I hate how my relationship status just says "In a relationship" and it doesn't say who with. I have a gorgeous boyfriend, I WANT to show him off! Anyway, I think I'm getting a bit weird from lack of sleep! Wanna get this essay done by half seven so I can get into bed with the boyfriend and get some last minute cuddles before he has to go... So I'm off, and ha, guess this whole entry was just me rambling about Bambi :) What can I say? I loves him, lots, like jelly tits (inside joke, not a typo)... Muchos Luff SitDiary! DakkyMonster xx

Thank you nothingness, thank you clarity, thank you, thank you silence.