Wow, for the first time in a while, I've checked this site, and believe it or not, it's actually working! There's really nothing new to talk about, and I've heard that since someone actually reads this thing, that I can no longer say "No one reads this", so I wont. This fraternity thing is starting to get to me. It's nothing against the people I'm doing it with, or even the people in the fraternity because it's not them, I can't really say anything bad about any of them, but it's just the social stuff that I'm just not up for. Basically, I'm what every person who's known for being funny is: if I know someone in the room, that's who I talk to, and I can't just talk to them, I have to be "on". If I'm not funny, I'm thinking I'm not great to talk to. It sucks, because I've been going to things where I don't know anybody and I'm just kind of sitting there against the wall trying to not look as stupid as I think I do. The fraternity sponsored some dance thing tonight and it was mandatory that anyone who was pledging show up to it. So...everyone did, and we figured we'd be there for a while because it would have a few people there. Well...to say that it bombed would be a huge understatement. If you did say that it bombed, it would be the social equivalent of a nuke. The only people there WERE people in the fraternity, and it was easily the most boring 3 hours I've spent in a while. People kept insisting that I should get up and dance with people, except there's a problem with that. I have white boy's disease, which is a natural killer of rhythm. That, and I go to punk concerts, and for those of you who don't know, people who listen to punk music are not great dancers. We have two ways of dancing: beating the shit out of each other in a mosh pit, and jumping up and down. These things are either a) hard to do, or b) incredibly fuckin' stupid when you're listening to rap music. I don't know, I'm not going to quit pledging, but I'm probably at least gonna say that I know I've screwed up by not hanging out with them more, so at least they wouldn't say I can't join just for that. It just sucks that because I'm always thought of as the funny one, and the one that people can talk to, I don't really have a sounding board for anything when I need something to say whats on my mind. My family would take it totally out of context, and the people I consider my friends either don't have the time or would just think it's me bitching, so I've kinda put socializing on hiatus for the moment, however temporary it is remains to be seen. I don't know, maybe I'm being a little sensitive about this, but I'm approaching the dubious 0-15 mark in terms of consecutive rejections, so forgive me if my confidence isn't exactly soaring. Anyway, I'm outta here. BRIAN: You should try speed dating! JOSH: Speed dating? No, for me that's the seventh circle of hell. Five rejections in five minutes? I'll skip it, thanks.