hm, i feel little tired,im feeling a little worn. But today was a good day. I went to st.cloud all by my lonesome in search for what infinity would wear. Black wings? marvelous. I am so excited for halloween. and just excited. not eXcited. I dont really know if i want to do a pill and a 1/2 for the occasion. it would be fun to just have fun sober. I think i remember what that feels like...psychology class is probably the best of example. I like how me and B thought we were all alone against the back wall and no one took notice of us (or at least i thought that) and then T.J and campbell join in on the fun. lol yeah those boys... :) Speaking of which, Dave completly crushed me today. I was looking forward to our nature walk...who the fuck gets together with a school group outside of school? Dave of course. or not. and then theres that other boy...who melts my heart,molds it back together, and then shatters it into a million tiny pieces. and then i scream "again, again!!" its torture, like being tickled. It hurts so bad, but it makes me laugh. What a confusing set of emotions i feel most of the time. I wish i just knew how he felt. I wish i had the courage to just ask. I tell myself im going to, and i play the scenario out in my head. But all the things i make him say in my mind are things he would never say...hes not the type to just tell me what i want to hear. God, im lame. im a liar/and a moron. ::and if love is blind then im just gunna have to feel my way through all of this::