i feel like im completly lost inside my mind, like maybe nothing is worth it and i shouldve died a long long time ago everyone tells me i should snap out of it and straighten up but why do i hold on to so many things that no one else can see. what exactly IS WRONG? i really feel like i should just start using again, and not giving a fuck about anyone and what they think i want to leave this fucking town and go somewhere where no one knows my name or my "story" not that many of them know it now but everyone likes to think they fucking do. and i know so many more people have it so much worse and im inconsiderate of how blessed i really am. but that doesnt take away the confusion and the hurt nothing i do is ever good enough no amount of progress is appreciated so whats the fucking point?? why should i stay alive? for what exactly am i breathing for my dreams are unatainable, my hopes have been diminished.