Pray to the pins, leave sacrifices Wear golf shoes. Every time you throw exclaim "TAKE THAT, YOU JERKS!" Continue this behavior until forcefully thrown out. When ever a strike "X" appears on the screen, start yelling about how this is a Black Panther conspiracy. Explain to the owner how your game is "All sorts of messed up" due to plate tectonics, then lose him in lingo. Demand compensation. Make lewd and graphic references to your "ball". Works well on Senior Ladies night Play bocci with extra lane balls Try to juggle the balls, when you drop them, start screaming about plate tectonics again. Every ten minutes run the entire length of the building beating your own head and speaking in tongues, then sit down as if nothing happened Bring full angling gear, ask how they're biting. Completely cover your ball in duct tape (sticky side out) then loudly complain about how your hook is off. Hide behind the pins, stick your head up laughing hysterically Use a curling weight instead, bring a full team of sweepers Throw refuse down the ball return, tell the owner the trash compactor is busted Make your presence known by arranging pentagrams out of candles on every lane except yours Root for the other team - bring banners. Make fun of your team - bring lettuce. Bring a foghorn, use at crucial moments. Even if you miss totally--At the top of your lungs scream STEEEEEERIKE Bring a small gold idol, demand the other team pray to it. Rent all the lanes, don't bowl. Blatently UNderscore yourself, then accuse the other team of cheating. When an opponent is on his backswing, race up and take his ball and run home. If your team is in the finals, throw nothing but gutterballs and blame plate tectonics. Trip EVERY member of the opposing team, trip your team, trip everyone. Wear a baseball uniform, bowl sidearm. Superglue police whistles to the hand-dryers. Leave town. Walk around asking people why they are here. Do this the whole night. Ask to use the house mic. Say you want to make an announcement, then expound on the sins of bowling. Name your ball something like "KILLER". Openly boast to everyone how great you are, throw like a wimp, do this all night Sit in your lane and heckle others with a bullhorn. Bring a dartgun. Be inventive. Wrestle with your ball. (WWF Style) Ask someone to ref. Run around sprinkling "magic fairy dust" on everyone's balls. Sponsor a Really Big Open Bowl Night. Don't even have a entrance Fee, advertise it like crazy using every mass media known to man, make the 3rd Prize $10,000 and a Porsche, the 2nd Prize $5,000 and a trip to Europe and 1st Prize a coffee mug. Then sit back a watch the fights. Leave.