Ok so lets see, since I last updated I graduated high school and have had the most amazing summer so far. Graduating really didn’t make me feel all that different. I didn’t cry or anything like I thought I would, which is good cause I really didn’t want those people to see me cry, especially when I was so happy to finally get away from 99.9% of them. I’ve had about enough of high school. It is a sad time though because it is a huge part of my life that is done and over with, but there is so much more I want to achieve in my life and there is no use regretting or being sad about anything. I really and truly do not regret anything so far in my life, especially everything that has been happening in the last few months. I especially don’t regret any of that because it has taught me so much. I feel like I have grown so incredibly much within the past two months. I feel like I’ve become more of the kind of person I really want to be. I want to especially thank Jerome for teaching me so much about myself. And anyone who knows the situation totally knows exactly why I am thanking him, for the people who don’t know, he is probably the last person you would think I would be thanking but yanno what you have no idea how much he changed my life, in one way or another. So many doors have closed and opened because of that relationship and I am so glad everything happened the way it did, I wouldn’t have had it happen any other way. I am so grateful for all of the new friendships that have blossomed because of all that. I am grateful for the people in my life who are making a positive difference and have shown me what it is to be truly happy. I am so happy with everything in my life right now. And Karen, omg Karen, you have been the bestest friend I could have ever asked for, you’ve been there for me through all of this and you haven’t tired once. You’ve always had my back even though you didn’t always support my decisions, but all I have to say is, look at everything now. Look how everything has changed, look how happy I am now. I truly believe that I wouldn’t be this happy now if I didn’t have such a horrible experience to compare it to and I know you know exactly what I mean when I say that. You understand me 210% and I don’t know what I would have done without you standing beside me these past few months, because if it wasn’t for you I don’t know if things would have worked out as nicely as they did. I needed your support and your understanding and I needed you to not question me, and you didn’t and I owe you the world for that, honestly.
Anyway, I feel so great right now, everything is wonderful. I couldn’t ask for more right now, God has blessed me ten-fold for everything and there is absolutely no words I can say to express my thanks. And I know that even if things don’t work out, I know that all of this happened for a reason and at least I know I did what I wanted and I made my own decisions. I only have myself to blame if things get messed up, and that’s the way it should be, I shouldn’t have to blame anyone else for my mistakes. I own them and take full responsibility for them, but I do not regret them, not for a second. I don’t think you should have to regret anything, ever. If people aren’t always pleased with you, so be it. If people get mad at you for being you or trying to find out who you are, so be it. They don’t truly love and care for you because they don’t want to see you grow and change even if it doesn’t always work out how they would like it to. I know I’m jumping around from topic to topic here but there has been so much on my mind in the past few weeks and tonight is the first night in a long time I feel like writing and letting it all out. I don’t even think I talked to Karen about all this, maybe I have, and if I did and I don’t remember sorry hun, it’s just I talk so much I forget what I talk about half the time. But yeah, I feel like my life has changed for the better, I feel happy, I feel free, I feel more and more everyday like the person I ultimately want to be. I know what I want now; I know exactly what I don’t want too. I know who I want in my life and the type of people I want to be around in college. I’m scared about college but I know it’s going to be a whole new growing experience for me and I hope I meet some awesome people in the process. And if I don’t, I know I will always have my crazy old lady best friend, at home waiting for me!
For right now I just want to enjoy my summer. I want to make these last few months count with the people I love and want to spend as much time as humanly possible with everyone before we all go our separate ways. I know the last couple weeks before we all leave are going to be hard, and that’s when I think I’m going to cry, but until then I want to live it up and have the time of my life, as the song says. Vacation with Karen should be amazing, we are both so excited. Hanging out with Matty is going to be awesome. Jeff and JC, well what can I say about those two except we are going to have some times; hopefully we can get Billy thrown in there sometime. And hopefully I will even see Michael around somewhere. So it should be an amazing summer, I cannot wait to spend time with all my favorite people! So that was a kinda long entry but I think it was necessary to get you all up to speed on what has been going on in the life of Christine Borchick. So I will try and update more often, cause it really helps me to get all this stuff out, yanno when I can’t be with Karen 24/7 :-P Peace out kids!