dude i thought i was fine with it, then i wake up to myspace. i was like ok if they (V and J18) like eachother thats fine, i won't hang out with him anymore. i'll just pretend i don't know him blah blah blah. then i go on myspace and read yet another bulletin about how happy he is. then i go to his page and she left him a couple short comments...so i go to her page and read the long comment he left her. according to the comment tonight's the first night this week she hasn't been over at his house. wtf dude. he would have been here right now if he had never met her. if he didn't like her like she claims, he wouldn't have completely stopped texting me. he's told me i'm "beautiful" more than once...i wonder how many times he has told her that. i felt comfortable with him! first guy in a long time that would come over and actually hang out AND stick around after sex. i don't usually get both. dude i hate myself for thinking this, but it's kinda one of those if i can't have him neither can she things. although that's just a thought that i will keep in my head. i'm sure next time i talk to her i will tell her it's ok and that i'm not mad...if she does end up with him i'll be SO incredibly pissed. ew i feel like SUCH a loser right now. so un-wanted and what not. oh well, atleast my best friend comes down from college tomorrow, hopefully that will get my mind off of all this. FUCK.