He called me twice. He didnt flake. He held me like nothing ever happend. He kissed me like he never wanted to kiss anyone else. Hes made it hard to trust anything. Im already too sure of myself that this is destined for certain heartbreak. I already lost once... and yet i didnt hesitate to throw myself back in the ring for another round. Why would i do that? Whats different now that wasnt back then? nothing is different. why cant i let my brain decide for once. what makes it so that i cant forget him... I have so many things i want to say to him, i want to tell him how bad he hurt me. How unfair he was the entire time, how i let everything go when i should have put my foot down, how id catch him in lies and still forgive him, how nothing he could do would make me unforgiving. But none of that comes to mind. And even if i wrote it down and took with with me, standing there trying to read him his guilty verdict, he would look at me and tell me how amazing i am and how it was never supposed to be that way and it wasnt his true intentions. And how that was the past and this is now and right now he was standing in front of me telling me he cares and that he was blind back then. And nothing will matter. Because facts are facts. I love him with all my heart. Hes the only one that comes to mind if anything goes wrong. How if i could just lay with him wrapped in eachothers arms i would be better instantly. Hes my heart, my love, my soul, my everything. Ive been without my everything for almost 5 months. But somehow being heartbroken and empty wasnt enough. He had to come back around...