I don't care if you tell me that I'm over reacting. I don't care if you call me an emo fuck. I don't care... I need to get this out and that's what I'm going to do. I can't do this. No one understands how insane, empty, alone, worthless, stressed, fucked over and just in general shitty i feel. I can talk to no one about how I feel about things. I don't have a friend who knows everything about me, I havn't found a single person who i can actually open up to. Why? Because it's always about them. When someone is having a shit day, or something is wrong. I'm the one trying to make it better, I'm the one helping them. When it comes to me? All i get is an 'Aw, i'm sorry... feel better'. At what point in your life are you going to realize that, that doesn't help me? You telling me to feel better isn't going to help, it's just going to make me wonder why i can't feel better. And to top it off, i don't even fucking know what's wrong, I don't know what's making me cry, I don't know what's tearing me up. I don't know anymore. You know, but that doesn't matter, it's just Chelsea she'll get over it. I can't always just get over these things. Me, Chelsea, the YOUNGER SISTER that has never really been important up until now is expected to save my brother and his girlfriends relationship. I'm supposed to me the messanger, letting each one know who the other is feeling, I'm supposed to give them advice. I can't give advice to people when I don't even know what to do with my own life. I have options night coming up, which is basically when you sit and uh chose the classes you're gonna take in grade 11 that will help you be what you want to be when you grow up. Of course I"m the only person who doesn't know where their life is headed... the only person who doesn't have their life planned out. I don'tknow where i'm going, fuck I don't know where I'm going to be in a year. And to fucking top things off, the boy I'm fucking in love with lives more than 700 miles away. 700... that's a fucking big number, I don't know if you know that... more than 11 hours. I can't do this anymore. god knows what this is... this is everything and anything... at the moment... I think the best thing in the world would to be to get shot in the back of the head with a gun. I give up.