there is a lot going on in my life right now. An old, Idk what to call him, "fuck buddy" for lack of a better term is friends with my roommate and I am trying to play nice. He seems to think things are fine but I still don't think we will ever be friends. But life tends to throw me curve balls when I least expect to see them. With him back in my life I've been thinking a lot about "him". The person that sexual abused me when I was 13. My friend says I tend to down play it but I've gotten over it enough to put perspective on it. It relates cause the "fuck buddy" claimed I raped him after 3 weeks of us fooling around. It was the 4th time we'd fooled around that I "raped him". but that is just one of the things in my life.

My boyfriend is leaving me for the marines. He has complete faith in our relationship lasting and I have non what-so-ever. from past experiences of course I know that I am no good with long distance. but again time will only tell.

I need a job for the summer but I don't want to apply because of personal issues with being rejected.

I'm nervous about grades but here I am complaining instead of doing homework. typical

I want to go to europe after I graduate but I haven't figured it out yet, because I don't know what I want out of life.

But Im sure everyone has issues. they come and they go and they are a part of life. but I find that they are flooding back after a weekend with my boyfriend, relaxing without a care in the world.