I some times wonder why I even bother to get out of bed. It has been a long time since any thing good has really happened in my life. I know life is not ment to be a cake walk but does every little thing have to also be a battle. I'm just so tired of having to fight day in and day out just to get any thing. Once again I have to look for a place to live. I was suppose to move in with two friends. That fell through. Then I was going to beable to stay with her and her family till Jan. Now that has also fell through on me. I have no idea where I'm going. I'm six and a half months pregnat and wondering what went through my head on having another child come into this world where most every one could careless about any one but themselves. I have been told I must do some thing about my stress level or I could cause myself to go into premature labor. Great not only am I fucking my own health up with being stressed now I'm putting my poor child in danger. I really want to curl up into a ball and hide from the world and just let it all pass me by. Maybe if I do that it won't fuck with me any more. Out of sight out of mind. Nowing my luck though I wouldn't go unnoticed and life would just fuck with me all that much more. I have been thinking about getting into church. I was forced as a child by my step father which left a bad taste in my mouth. I know that is why I have issues with relgion. My problem now is finding a church that in nonjudgemental. I know they all are suppose to be but that is not the case most of the time. And well if any of you have ever seen me well lets just say I like body piercing and most frown apon that. So I would need a church that did not judge me for that or the fact that I'm an unwed mother. I know they hate sex before marrage but what can I say there is no why I could marry some one before having kicked the tires. I nkow myself well enough that if he were not good in bed I would wander. It's human nature I don't care what any one says. Well shit I'm feeling a bit sleepy and I do have to work tonight so I think I will lay down and nap a bit.