Okay, I'm not really crestfallen but I can't believe that 10 years of my life are gone. I just watched the series finale of Friends. The 90's are now officially over along with my teens. It's insane how attached a person can get to fictional characters on TV. For 10 years these people have been my friends. What a freaking cliche. The finale of this show means more to me than the end of some cash-cow. It symbolizes everything I yearned for and wanted to become while growing up. I wanted to move to New York and live in some apartment building with friends that I could always count on. Now it seems like that dream will never come true. It seems like I never even dreamed it. My life is so much different then I thought it'd be. And I have to admit it is not for the better. I'm living my life for other people. It sucks. I'd like to say that I have had an epiphany but I know that tomorrow I'll still be the lame ass good-girl who always plays by the rules and does what she should. I'm very tired of that. In 8 days I will have completed my first year of college. In a month Jenn graduates from high school. Jenn. I just can't believe that she's 18. I miss when we were 13. I miss her. I miss a lot of things. Like I miss my dog, my house, my mom, my teacher Mr. Callahan. But I refuse to live my life looking backward while always stumbling forward. I will continue with college even though I don't want to but I will pick a major and I'm going to save my money so if I ever grow the balls to move to New York I'll be able to. And Carol where ever you are: CALL ME!