Everytime I seem to love someone, or like them a lot, they never return that feeling. Not just romantically, but in every other way. I'm fairly sure no one loves me. I have absolutely no self worth, I've written it on my skin with a razor enough times to know this by now. None of my friends really know me not really. They know a side of me, the happy one. She's not really happy anyway, that's pretty much all fabricated. The only person who knows I hurt myself is the one trying to convince me to keep living. He says that things will get better, that one day someone will adore me. I don't see that happening. Not if i can't even like myself. There's just no point. I few days ago I thought I was dead; I didn't know where I was or what I was feeling, my entire being was lost in thought of life and death and pain. I lost it a few times and tried to bash myself, the bruises are small but noticeable. I had another appointment with my psychiatrist, who knows nothing of this, and managed to convince him I was completely sane. I don't think that's a good thing, I mean, he could be able to help me. But I just don't trust him. I don't trust anyone. My life isn't even in my own hands anymore, it is in the hands of another person who I talk to by phone or MSN. We're not close in real life, we can never get away from others. I'm so confused. I want to die everyday of my life, but I'm too scared to. My entries are always so sad and pathetic, I'm sorry to anyone who made it this far reading.