Joshua- o, baby, how i want to hold you now and whisper to you that everything is okay, but thats the thing everythng isnt ok, and probally wont be in a while. when i read about your cutting i wanted to cry, just knowing my own personal struggle, its so hard to see someone else and realize they have that pain too. i dont feel sorry for people most of the time, but my heart longs to you, just knowing i cant help you. reassuring words in the end are just.....words, they arent going to fix a broken heart, mend the seams of others decietful work. your too far away right now to hold, to kiss, 'to crawl in bed with', but remember the want is still there. what i want is too offer some peaceful chrisitian advice, but i know i hate that when i hear it. so what im going to say is i wish icould kiss each scar away, dull each sharp object, and hold both your hands so you cant do anything....and since im not there right now to do, imagine i am each time you pick something up, when your tempted, imagine im holding your hands, or im right infront of you....would you deliberatly hurt me by cutting yourself...look at it that way, your hurting me by hurting you. life is a mess, when is it not? ive been at peace with myself once, and guess what that lasted o about less then a month. life isnt ever going to be easy, but trust me it gets better, just wait....be a patient person my love. imgoing to bed now because you didnt get on or call back, im sure nothing i said really affected you any, but i pray that it did. i wish i could crawl in your lap and just hold you, rest my head against your shoulder and take in your scent.....remember the beautiful things in life still exist and are longing to stare you straight in the eyes. always, Qwyla