you know, i never thought i'd be here. I never thought I'd actually be a senior having to apply to colleges and start a life making resumes and being 18. jordan is in new york again. i didnt want that. but it has to happen. there's nothing i can do about anything ya know? its like i have no control over the way my life goes. i cant control jordan being here. i cant control my acceptance into college. i cant control what happens in my last year of high school. its all out of my hands. that sucks. what i slip. what if i fail. i cant breath out of one nostril. thats annoying. i want it to be may. i want to go to college. i want jordan back.