"I don't want to fall to pieces I just want to sit and stare and you, I don't want to talk about it and I don't want a conversation I just want to cry in front of you, I don't want to talk about it because I'm in love with you."
I am tired of pretending that I don't hurt because he is with her. Because apparently I hurt if I am sitting here crying. I just wish i didn't love him...i wish i couldnt care for him. but i do love him and i do care. he is the only one I have told i love you too and actually mean it and feel it. i just don't get it anymore. how can i love him so much yet be so hurt by him? i have tried so hard to avoid this situation...so why does it have to happen to me? why? i just want to give up because he is my world. and that I cannot screw up, i don't wanna ruin it at all. but it just feels like everything is getting ripped apart, that like our friendship is nothing anymore, and i can't stand it. i just want to be with him no matter what. friends is great. i just wish for once he would know what i feel, what i think about him and everything. he is my everything which gives me hope...that which he'll never know
i just want a fairytale life!
lizzie
ANyway See You Some time this week maybe????