man i wish i was beautiful... 'spose we all have one of those days, more than one in succesion is starting to get to me, contemplating suicide again, fuck everyone, yet i contradict myself by feeling lonely... insulting, hurting the people i love makes me feel better, a facade i guess, it's just a defense mechanism, automatic, like my boring daily routine (boring because i'm depressed and sick of my life - god, i wish something exciting will happen today, regardless of the fact that i know for a fact that today is going to follow my daily routine just like every other...). please excuse me for appearing so self-centred, i am, after all, only human. but how's everyone else out there?