well today fair and so did yesterday/last night. everything is cool with joe which means alot to me so ye...and i can tell how much it has been obviously bothering me cos now i just feel....good. and i've realised that alot of people have a problem with the way i am,and to those people i am sorry but your gonna have to deal cos for the first time in my life last night i told myself that i love me.i felt good to hear that from myself,its good to hear it off other people but to hear it off yourself really does something. i am the way i am but for a long time i've just been what other people told me to be but now i'm myself again. note to self:don't ever let someone,not even a friend try and take over your life and make you think what they want you to think. must remember that in future. yeah-last night spoke to joe on msn everything was cool until he mentioned hazel...and what can i say i kinda slipped up so came off and decided to apologise to him via text and told him something that i've been wanting to say for the last two weeks. so yeah have decided that saying what is on my mind is a good idea. to ste,i don't hate you i never have and i never will even tho it would be probably easier for you if i did,but i'm not going to.you can continue to post your comments on everything that i write on here cos i know waht you think of me and why.so yeah,go ahead hun,let it all out.the people who know me know exactly who i am and what i'm all about and as long as those people know that i'm not the 'TOTAL BITCH FROM HELL WHO EVERYONE SHOULD HATE' then thats fine with me. one more time i'll say that i'm truely sorry,you can either luagh or accept it either way it seems i'm being the mature one by apologising sincerely. kacyx