I'm tired of everything. I'm tired of school, I'm tired of work, I'm tired of my parents, and I'm tired of living in my own house. I'm tired of my repetitive lifestyle. I have no money to get out and do anything let alone afford gas. My job sucks and it definitely doesn't pay me enough to do what I do. I do Level 3 work and I'm getting paid as a Level 1. This job can shove it. My parents are being assholes. I didn't go home Saturday night. I stayed with Jeff all night and all day Sunday. I even called in to work. Jeff called in so I called in. That and I had to take him to the doctor's office for the little incident that hurt the hell out of his back. I can't stand my parents anymore. They suck the money out of me every chance they get by manipulating me. It's getting old. School's stressful. Being a Senior in High School isn't all that bad, really. We just have a lot of shit due all at once. It's stressful. Especially when you have a fucking part-time job. School can shove it. Jeff doesn't trust me. We almost broke up a couple weeks ago over something really, really stupid. I "broke a promise", therfore, he can't trust me anymore. He says he does but I can't believe him. He never acts like it. He took me back though but only because I think he felt obligated to. He says he loves me and he says the ring on my finger is still a promise but I can't believe him. I don't believe him. He complains I still don't fully trust him and that I'm constantly paranoid and jealous. Of course I'm going to be. Look at him. He's incredibly attractive, sweet, romantic, and he knows how to take care of a woman. Any girl would go for him. He could have any girl he wants. But he chooses me. Why? It puzzles me. He says because I like him for who he is and I'm the only girl he's been with that doesn't want to change him or try to change him. I understand that, but, I don't know. He says I'm nice and sweet and sexy and caring. Well, his main word is "awesome". But, he was willing to leave me once and I know he'd do it again if anything were to trigger him to. I don't think he would miss me like I would miss him. I cannot live without him. I would seriously kill myself if he ever decided to permanently leave me. He doesn't love me like I love him. At least I don't think he does. He doesn't want me like I want him and he doesn't need me like I need him. I think I need to just let him go. So he can go find the one person that will truely make him happy. I've got a race or two after school. This is going to kick ass.