I don't want to have to deal with this anymore. I know I've said it many, many times but I can't put up with it. I'm in tears right now and why? I don't really know. All I know is that my so-called "serious boyfriend" is out at a bar right now with his "best friend" (Who, by the way, is a chick.) doing god-knows-what. What is so important at the fucking bar that they have to go every fucking week. He always says he never has fun or that he gets really bored. Well if it's such a goddamn drag, why does he insist on calling up his "best friend" to go to the fucking bar every fucking week? I don't understand him. And tonight, he's like "I'm not even going to drink. I'm sick." THEN WHY GO?! I don't fucking understand him. Do they meet people up there? Does his "best friend" hook him up with random chicks every time they go? What? I'd like to know. I'd like to know what's so fucking important about a bar that they have to go every week. Sometimes twice a week. Whatever. So I'm thinking about having a nice, long, serious talk with Jeff. Everytime I bring shit like that up though, he gives me the whole "you don't trust me" speech. And then he gets mad at me. I cannot do this anymore. I do trust him, I just don't trust other people. Shit happens and people cheat. I know he's never cheated before, but, there's a first time for everything. And knowing my luck, I'll be the first he cheats on. I'm tearing myself up over this. I need to stop. I seriously can't do this. Either something needs to change or this is over. Because right now, him calling himself "serious" in this relationship, is one huge fucking joke to me.