I'm getting married in less than 7 months... I am so damn excited... the other night I had my first dream about Anthony since I wrote the last entry... I really thought I was done with that part of my life but my mind thinks otherwise... I mean I know hes back in USA now and I just wish he could see me now. I look so much better than I did when he last saw me... I mean I know that he is an asshole and that he does not deserve my thoughts but I can't help it. He was such a large part of my life and I just wish he wouold call me... oh right I changed my phone number... lol. I might call him to see if he answers... nah... I just wish he would get out of my head...