So I found my long lost best friend from way long ago when I used to live in Massachusetts. It's pretty cool since I never thought I would ever talk to him again since he ended up moving after I did. My mom is hoping that we might see him at church on Christmas since I think his mom goes to the same church as my sister and we always go with her to that Mass. It's pretty weird. Yet really cool. I mean I know I haven't talked to him in like eleven years but I still feel like, omg he's my old best friend and I know him wo well, even though I don't. I feel very homesick for Dalton. I did end up JDI-ing it and calling that guy. He seems pretty cool, so we're gonna hang out at some point. That should be fun, I still can't believe I called him. That is about it though. I'm off to Roberts Wesleyan tomorrow until Saturday for a scholarship competition type thing. Wish me luck. Is it weird that I feel like I still know Christopher even after all these years? I remember so much about when we were three. It's all so... I don't quite know. I was glad he at least remembered who I was. I hope he isn't like...wow, she is a dork for remembering all this. I am a dork, but I wouldn't want him to think that. Well, I guess he can, but I don't think he will. I think he sorta knows me better than that. Without actually knowing me for a long time. Hm. So yeah. -Cty

I'm really liking school. Senior year is like a giant party with some work involved. I'm loving it. I'm loving having something to do. Things to be busy with. There isn't a whole lotta stress. Sure there are things, but I don't mind. I love most of my classes (with the exception of Physics). I like this guy. But I'm really content with taking things really slow and not really even pursuing things. I'll just let it fall where it may. Things are good. Very good. ;)

I think Andy is pissed at me. I was telling him a couple days ago about the problems regarding me and el Stupido, and he got pissed at me saying, "Well, he's still my friend you know. You can't hold a grudge forever." Then today I was telling him how I'm helluva busy with Sunday School starting next weekend, Student Council coming up, TIGERS, Sci Oly, etc. And he was just like "We you're just busy, like everyone else." I hate to say, but I think I'm a HELL OF A LOT BUSIER than more than half of the whole school. And it pisses me off that I think he's mad at me. First off, I know he's friends with Jim, but that doesn't mean I have to be buddy buddy with him too. I'm sorry if apparently Andy can get along with everyone and I'm not gonna let people treat me like crap and be all buddy buddy with them. I'v totally forgiven him for what he did, but I will NEVER forget it. I dunno. I'm ranting. I'm gonna go read more of Othello, the tragedy from HELL!

Well, I did a lot of thinking and I think everything will be ok. I really think that el Stupido and I can be just friends. Well, at least, I know I can. And I know I won't go back out with him. I have my list and all so everytime I'm like "ehhh" I read it. So anyways. On a lighter note... I won my tennis match today. The other girl had to forfit because she had an appointment. But she was a good match. I won the first game 7 to 5. And it was tied 2-2 when she left. So really, it could have been close. Then I played a doubles match with Laura and that was fun. We won that too. I think it was 8-1. And I got my schedual. Or at least, I heard about it. I guess my guidance counselor was having trouble. But we have it all under control. Here it is. Even though no one will care really. I have a really heavy course load. 1- Health/Child Development 2- Gym/Physics Lab 3- Wind Ensemble 4- Concert Choir 5- Physics 6- SUPA English 7- Lunch 8- Calc 9- SUPA Gov't & Eco. And then I have Computer Science for Independent Study. So yeah. I'm gonna be really busy. I'm pretty excited though because I get one fun class (Child Development). I wanted something like that or a psych class. In this class, you get to have a baby for a week. It's kinda hard, but it should be fun. So yeah. I'm out. Oh and boo crap. I have an interview at Union on Thursday and an interview at Clarkson on Sat, which means I have to leave Friday (no football game :( ) and go that awful ride up. Oh well. Pz. S2

I am a self declared retard. I IMed el Stupido. Why you ask? I don't quite know. It was an awfully stupid thing to do. I don't want to get involved in any of the upcoming drama. I don't want him back. Is it possible for us to just be friends? Let's hope. I just don't want to go there. Why am I shaking? What the hell is up with me.

So Monday marked the beginning of tennis. I have to admit it is far better than soccer was at the end of last year. I don't really care that I'm not even close to the best. I just have fun with it. Of course, it has it's frustrating moments, but I'm loving it. Today the coach is supposed to tell us our ranking, and then we can challenge to go higher. I'm gonna feel bad if I challenge someone, but I guess I gotta do it. Whatevs. I'm out for now. -cty

I got an 83 on my Chem regents! I'm so flippin happy. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not a stupid person. But let's just say Chem is in no way my strong point. So it has finally sunk in. I am a senior. Wow. I stayed over at Erica's last night. It was a lot of fun. We hung out with some of her friends and had a blast. Albany isn't that bad after all. And we visited UMASS @ Amherst today. It's quite nice, even if it is HUGE. That is about it. I'm going to try to get the song that I'm listening to on my profile somehow. The lyrics sort of hit home. I'm such a dork. And people are reading this now because they can on the main page. I can't believe that I never realized that. Oh well. I doubt anyone whe is mentioned in here would have a sitDiary anyways. Tootlez.

Today is the day. At 12:30 I have my chem test. What will become of me after that test, I know not. Enzo is bringing me home though. My madre has to bring Adam to his doctors and wouldn't be back until 4:30(ish) so I was like...um, no, I need a ride before that. I hope Enzo doesn't take this the wrong way, as he tends to do. My bruise from yesterday when Andy made me hit his car (long story, and it was revenge) hurts really bad. It's a good thing it hasn't affected my tennis. I'd KILL him. Well, there isn't much to write right now. I'll be back later. -moi

Lately I've been totally digging Weezer. But that has nothing to do with what I'm here to say. Actually there isn't much to say. I saw this semi-cute boy but I hear he doesn't have it all together so it's not really worth it. Not to mention he lives in Massachusetts. Har har. Plus, if you know my taste in guys, he wasn't really cute at all. Ha! But something cool happened. My parents were in Agawam, MA and they looked up a name in the phone book. This name happened to belong to my best friend whom I lived near when I, in fact, lived in Mass. I guess his fathers name was in there. But his parents are divorced. They said they would have gone if I was there, but I wasn't. So another lead at my old best friend. I have a feeling someday I will meet up with him. Maybe not. But I have that feeling like I could see him again, you know? Like with some people I just know I won't see them again, and I don't think much of it after the fact. But I think about him every so often. So I think I might meet up with him in the future. That was weird. But anyways. So yeah. I think that is about it. I dunno what else there is to say. Tomorrow is ANDY + COURTNEY DAY! Ha. Yeah Andy and I haven't chilled, just the two of us in a long time. So it's long overdue. I'm going to Senior Ball with him. I'm glad because he is my best friend and I can't think of anyone else I would want to go with. (Not to mention there isn't anyone else who would.)The only thing I get a little if-y about is the fact that snowball last year was weird when we went together. We didn't really hang and when we danced it was sooooo awkward. I dunno. I love Andy, but I'm not sure if it is love love or that brotherly-sisterly love. Lately I have been wondering. Not to mention I'm not sure if he...well...yeah. Hrm. The questions of life. No time to ponder now. I guess I'll get it out of him tomorrow. S2 -cty

I'm chez ma soeur. I'm watching the boys tonight and we got EAST SIDE! w00t! Right now Chrissy's step-sister Becky is over. She seems nice but I don't really know her. I kinda feel out of place around her and her sister Abby. But I like their names. But anyways. Becky is pregnant. It looks as if she is pretty far along too. I guess it's a boy. I'm not sure how old she is, but I think she's around 20. It's pretty admirable though that she is having the baby. I think that is about it. I felt like trying to look like I was actually doing something so I didn't feel so out of place. Peace out. -cty

Background info: I was supposed to go to Zoom Floom with Jenny, Misha and Torin today. Yesterday my Madre and papi said I couldn't go for various, stupid yet logical reason. So yes. I'm a bit t.o.'ed. I feel bad because I really thought I could and then last minute I couldn't. I dunno, in a way I was relieved and I didn't care much, but I don't know why. I think Jenny was really pissed. I could understand why though. They need four people to go on the two person rides. Although I honestly don't think that a majority of the rides will be two person. But still, I feel bad, but it wasn't my fault! My parents are the ones that kinda flubbed up. On a different note, Adam has REALLY been pissing me off lately. I guess his whole facade as finally worn thin. I don't believe him anymore and everything he does just pisses me off. Maybe it's me. Maybe all this is really me. I don't know. But a lot of people seem to be getting biotchy and annoying. I need a change of scene/people for a day or two. I can't wait for school to start.

ARGH! So I got my hair done today. I got some low lights and some high lights. It looks nice, I thought. However, my mom had a fit. She obviously can't get over the fact that I'm growing up and I'm not her little blond daughter anymore. Needless to say, she flipped even more when I didn't get it like SHE wanted it and it costed $105. I admit that is a lot. But I didn't know! So she flipped. She hated my hair. But I told her I don't give a shit. And I don't. It's my effing hair. And just so I don't have to hear her biotch anymore, I'm going to get a job. Not that I have time to get a job. But screw it! I will. This house SUCKS. ARGH :(

I went up to my Great Uncle's camp at Galway. It was so nice to go back there. I haven't been there in so long. Before my Grandpa (Poppy) had died. It was so long ago, yet I remembered everything. The lake, the paths, the swings. It was such a flashback. That and the fact that my Uncle Eb looks almost identical to my Poppy now. I was weird. I was trying to take everything in. Just incase I never see him or the camp again. I wish my Poppy was still alive. I know he's having a blast up in heaven, but I miss him a lot. It almost felt that if I looked at my Uncle Eb long enough, my grandpa would just appear. Or come walking up from the lack going "Hi there Courtney, boy I've missed you. Sorry about that, but don't worry now. I'm back." I hate how people die. It's so sad. But anyways. Going up to the camp wasvery refreshing. It was just what I needed. Things around here just weren't cutting it for me. I needed to get out. I haven't felt this good since 123104 and 010105. Now I'm off to see Seussical: The Musical, with Jenny. Tomorrow is the Backstreet Boys concert at SPAC! I'm quite excited. Yesterday's LNI was pretty fun. I was quite mellow, didn't talk as much as I usually do. I don't know. Something was weird. I felt kind of lonely. Today has been one of the first days I've actually thought I wanted a boyfriend. But I don't, but I do, but I don't. You know the deal. I sort of just want to get away from it all. I really wish that we had a camp. That would be so nice. I remember how I went to El Stupidos camp and I loved it there. I could have just lived there forever. Unfortunately, with that camp, comes El Stupido, and as much as I loved the camp, it just isn't worth it. I guess that has been bothering me too, lately. I'm over him, but I'm not. Well, I am, but it seems that I'm still hurting from what he did. Well, Jenny will be here shortly. I'm sure she will cheer me up too. S/blah/2

Well I am off to Cape Cod today with my sister and her family. I'm pretty excited since I haven't been there in a long time. I haven't been on this for a while but not too much has happened. Main Overview: I want to go to Messiah College. Michelle came back for a couple weeks. That is about it. It's kinda funny. There is plenty to say, but I just don't feel like typing it all. I'll write more when I get back...Aug. 1st. S2 -Cty

So I liked this guy. And I thought he liked me. In fact I guess a lot of people thought he liked me. Obviously, that could never happen to moi. It's kinda amusing. So the whole group went to see the movies the other night. And he held my hand. I was like, whoa, nice-ness. However, after, my roommate told me he was trying to get in her pants and he liked her and was just holding my hand because I was scared. I was like. Ouch. It kinda stings. Not to mention, my roommate has a boyfriend so she was pissed too. I love my friends here at Clarkson, they are too great. I'm going to miss them :( I'm sorta kinda out of it though, because of the whole movie ordeal. It was weird. Like, I can't believe I was so stupid. And I actually thought he liked me. I guess that just doesn't happen. ::sigh:: I don't believe that he didn't get the whole situation though. I think he's trying to pull a fast one and make it seem like he didn't do anything wrong. Screw guys. Seriously. I haven't really met a decent guy. Well, Eric was nice. That just wasn't gonna work out though. But he was nice. Evan, he meant well at least. El Stupido, well I don't really want to talk about that one. It kinda bums me out that I can't find a decent guy. I always fall for the losers. I guess I'm just gonna forget about them for a while, a nice relationship will find me when it's time. So I'm out. I don't know what I'm going to do since I have nothing to do, but I will do it anyways! S/2

So I'm back from vacation. Thousand Islands rocked and RYLA at St. Rose was pretty cool. I found out that I will be attending the Summer Program up at Clarkson University, which is cool. Not to mention I get $1,000 a year more for attending. That brings my Clarkson Scholarship money up to $48,000 (aka, $12,000 a year). I'm too lazy to write now, so I will go back to talking to Katie and Conf. Adieu. S2 Oh and I went to Canada!

I just woke up and I still can remember at least two of my dreams. First is the less important one. We were at the Renaissance Festival with people from my school and we were watching a thing with horses. And the horses got kinda crazy. And so Amanda and I were watching these knights try to collect hoops on a stick while riding and she said FIGHT FIGHT! But another knight said not to yell. And so the horse came over and tried to get us. And I ran and curled up into the fetal position. against a wall. Unfortunately the horse came over and put his knee on my back and wouldn't get off. And so I woke up and my back was tingly. It was weird. So anyways, here is the "better" dream. I was randomly driving in Altamont and for some reason I had the urge to go to Zack's house. Cept it was the house across the street from his. So I rang his doorbell, even though the door was open and he was there. And he put on his sneakers and came out. So we drove around and we talked. I told him he didn't have to come if he didn't want to, but he just smiled. Then I proceeded to lie and say all my friends at home weren't around and I thought "Why not you?!" It was a pathetic try at a lame excuse. Then we stopped at the church. And we went over and he took a picture of this snowman thing hanging and it had some words on it about not killing our brothers in war, and it was by my dad. And so Zack took a picture of it with his camera phone and said he could send it to me. For some reason I had a show off and he had his off, and he was wearing one of my shoes. So I told him and he gave me my shoe back. Then we walked around to the side and there was an inground swimming pool right between the church and the parking lot. What is weirdest, is that this is not the first time I've dreamed about a pool by the side of the church. Anyways, so I was looking through the fence around the pool and he went and put his feet in the water. He said it was really nice. I told him I beleived him and walked a little closer. Then he came and picked me up and was trying to dunk me in the pool, but I Was like, "Ah! I'm not a good swimmer, if you're going to throw me in, do it in the shallow end." So he took me and swung me, as if he was going to throw me in, and then just laid me on the side with my feet in. And of course I was struggling to get away, but he just held me down. Then he said "Isn't it relaxing?" And I lied and said yes because now I had sneakers on and I couldn't feel the water. But then I dipped my heel in more and I felt it, and it was nice. And he just held me. And I was like. Wow, this is nice. And then a bit later, I was like, "but I bet it's just warm on the top, and it's colder under the water more." And so I put my foot in more and I was right, it was cooler. And he just held me. I was just lying there, being held. It was weird. It's weird when you have dreams about people you are not interested in, and also, in that case, haven't seen in about a year. But it was nice. Like, I just liked it, I felt very safe, and it was very real, because when I woke up, my blankets were around me like someone was holding me. It was safer and more comforting than when I've been with El Stupido, or anyone. It was so perfect. Yet, it was a dream, and either way, I don't like that boy. Or the other two I had weird dreams about other nights. I guess you have to dream about someone, right? Since I don't really have anyone I like, then it might as well be someone. I can't wait until college. (which is only a year away, wow). And RYLA. That is going to be some fun! Not to mention... I'M A BLOODY SENIOR NOW! w00t x's 51 kajillion and seven thirty-fifths

Well, well, well. Yesterday was one of the best day's I have had in a while. First I had my Social Regents. I was kinda moody because I was going to sleep in, but my dad did not get it and woke me up with Adam and told me I had to go to school. So then, I woke up around 9ish I guess. I ate breakfast, and was online. I don't really remember actually, so I could be making that all up. Okay, but now the important stuff... So I went to school around 11:15 so I was there at like 11:22. Amusing. So I sat with Jenny, Tracie, Steph, and Rozee and we all talked until we got called down. But while we were talking Mr. Mattice came by and he told me and Jenny we both had gotten high A's on our term papers, so I was like FREAKING W00t! We did like 3 rapid fires, that is how good it was! lol. It ended up being a 97! Heck yes! So then, I went and took the regents. It wasn't that hard, so it was all good. Except I did space out a bit during the multiple choice and the DBQ. Oh well, at least my Thematic kicked arse. THEN! Mrs. Merrill, my pre-calc teacher, came and told me I had gotten a 91 on my math final! w00t! I was so (and still am) FREAKING HAPPY! I studied like whoa for that. So it definately paid off. Let's see. Then I brought Jenny home, and we decided it was quite a nice day. The kind of day for a...PHOTO EXCURSION! But I didn't really want to go up to Berne that late in the day, because I hate going up that stupid hill. The Altamont-Berne Road thingy. Yeah, it sucks. So instead we decided we would grab a sandwich at Hungerford Market (best sandwich shop in...the world, ok, I lie, but I'm sure it's up there.) So we went there, and we saw these kids on bikes and I was like "CRAP! I think I know them." So we walked up to the shop all cool and then it was freaking closed. It was so funny though, because Jenny started screaming "Good going Courtney! Way-to-go! It's closed you dummy!" And I, of course, was petrified, on account of I know people around there, and I think I knew the kid riding his bike. So, of course, when I told Jenny this she proceeded to scream "COURTNEY! THIS STORE IS CLOSED!" Needless to say, I was mortified. But it was funny. So, with the shop closed, we decided to just go back to Jenny's. I was going to travel up to Knox for photos, cept I was way to lazy and hungry. However I will be up there later, for the sake of Katie-May. So then we hung out at Jenny's and I had to meet my family at Jumpin' Jacks. So I went there. It was fun exccept Adam was hogging the kids so I was like you IDIOT! But it was still fun, and muchos good food. So after that I went home and then I went to Jenny's at 6. This is where the real fun started... So, I went to Jenny's to study for the Chem Regents (today!) and on the way there these two little punk kids put a frog in teh middle of the road for me to run over. Of course, I swerved. I was pissed though, so I got out of my car yelled at them, then went inside the house. Then I told Jenny and she helped me go over there and move the frog. Okay, actually, I had to jump at it so it would hop away. Then we decided to stay outside so they wouldnt bring the frog into the road again. Although, I scared them away because I kept yelling at them. I was pissed, but it was funny. So we sat out on teh lawn for maybe 10 minutes and then a bee stung me. On my butt. It hurt a lot. Like, a lot a lot. So I had to go and change into a pair of Jenny's pants and eventually I put ice on it. It felt a lot better. So then we studied on Jenny's driveway. Then Torin came over. And we were making fun of people, and that was great fun. Granted it was almost mean, everyone has to do it sometime. Yesterday was our time. So we did that, drew pictures, learned the difference between f.i.s.s.i.o.n and fussion that was helpful. Then I decided that, hey I want to go swimming! So I changed into a pair of Jenny's boxers and I went swimming in everything. It was a JDI thing. And I was proud of myself. So we went swimming for probably and hour and then I left. It was so much fun.

..INFO.. 01. name: Courtney, Court, Pep-ay, Corgy, Naze 02. single or taken: single 03. sex: female 04. bday: november 18, 1987 05. sign: scorpio 06. siblings: brother(35) and sister(32) 07. hair color: blond 08. eye color: blue 09. shoe size: 6.5 10. height: 5' 1.75" ..RELATIONSHIPS.. 01. who are your best friends?: my sister, andy, jenny, katie, elisa, my mom 02. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: nope ..FASHION -n- STUFF.. 01. where is your favorite place to shop: old navy 02. any tattoos or piercings: 3, ears ..SPECIFICS.. 01. do you do drugs?: nope 02. what kind of shampoo do you use?: i use like 4, herbal essances, suavee, and some other stuff 03. what are you most scared of?: death young, spiders, heights, stupid people 04. what are you listening to right now?: my mother talking to the dog. heh. 05. who is the last person that called you?: andy or my madre 06. where do you want to get married?: yeah 07. what would you change about yourself?: nothing really, maybe a bit thinner ..FAVORITES.. 01. color: purple and blue and pink 02. boy names: elijah, caleb 03. girl names: hannah, rose, anntoinette, alexis 04. subjects in school: history, english, wind ensemble, concert choir 05. sports: soccer, tennis, football ..HAVE YOU EVER.. 01. given anyone a bath?: yea, actually, last night i gave Liam and Aiden baths, and that was the first time I'd ever given a kid a bath 02. smoked?: nope 03. made yourself throw up?: nope 04. skinny dipped?: no 05. been in love?: i don't know. 06. pictured your crush naked?: it is a possibility 07. cried when someone died?: yeah 08. lied: maybe 09. fallen for your best friend?: eh. 10. been rejected?: yeah. 11. rejected someone?: eh. yeah. 12. used someone?: nope 13. done something you regret?: nope ..CURRENT.. 01. clothes: clam-diggers, blue shirt, 4 bracelets 02. make-up: heh, that mineral stuff, blush, a little mascara, eyeshadow, possible some lip stuff left. i put it on this morning. 03. annoyance: people who bite their nails. 04. smell: some fuity flowery smell 05. favorite artist: i guess elisa 06. favorite group: Enter the Haggis, Goo Goo Dolls 07. book you're reading: Bloomability for the jillionth time, and The Story of A Not It Girl, for the second time. 08. dvd in player: I think The Patriot (upstairs) and prob a BBC movie downstairs. 09. color of toenails: pink with purple flowers ..DO YOU EVER.. 01. sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to IM you?: i used to, occasionally, heh. 02. save conversations: sometimes, important ones. ..ARE YOU.. 01. understanding: sometimes 02. open-minded: for the most part 03. arrogant: occaisionally, but hey, i'm awesome! 04. insecure: sometimes 05. interesting: i'd say so. 06. random: quite often. DUCK! 07. hungry: not right now 08. smart: yeah 09. hard working: sometimes 10. organized: sometimes 11. healthy: i guess 12. shy: sometimes, depends who i'm around. 13. difficult: yeah, sometimes 14. attractive: i guess, sometimes. 15. bored easily: sometimes. 16. messy: eh, sometimes 17. responsible: yeah 18. obsessed: WITH ORLANDO BLOOM! HOTT! 19. happy: yeah 20. hyper: sometimes 21. trusting: eh, with some. ..RANDOM.. 01. in the morning i am: grumpy if i'm woken up, quite plesant if i wake up by myslef 02. love is: precious. 03. i dream about: weird things, they are amusing. 04. sexual preference: i like boys. especially the quite, smart ones. ..WHICH IS BETTER.. 01. coke or pepsi: neither 02. flowers or candy: flowers 03. tall or short: for a guy=tall, for me=short-er ..OPPOSITE SEX.. 01. what do you notice first: face, their "air" about them. 02. last person you slow danced with: i think...Nic, at prom. He was such a good date.

Still in Massachusetts, but we are leaving today. I've been in a eh mood today. Sometimes Adam and I really don't get along. I just dislike him greatly. And sometimes I don't. We really are like brother and sister. It's almost amusing. I got a coconut bra today though. I am pleased. Now all I need to do is lose enough weight to fit into a bikini. Or at least, what I think is fit. I could now, but I just don't think I'm thin enough. No one likes to see chubby bikini wear-ers. So yeah. That is my summer goal, besides learn all the words to Numa Numa (which I have almost done). I am kinda out of it because I just woke up, so I will stop rambling. Oh, and we went to Joannes Fabrics and my mom got this cute fabric and this pattern for a halter sun dress, which i have to make. That should be fun. Ha ha. I hope it comes out ok. Peace out my homies.