32 i hate making up titles to these things 2/24/2003 OK so it hit me today- I AM SO STUPID. Sometimes I wish i could just KICK myself. Here I am- MR.SElfish himself. So I figured this weekend would be a good time to just get away from everything, to just hang out and have a good time and put all the crap behind me. But then I remember, FUCK! I'm not the only one going through this. Here I am going out every single night this three day weekend, paying no mind about my dad and family. MY sister and brother go out of their way to come back from college to see mom and be with dad, and here I am going out and hanging with stupid people doing dumb things. Sure it worked, I forgot about things for a brief moment in time, but what good does that do? I know, at least for myself, that i feel lilke i have let everyone down- including myself. I really need to get my shit together, but I never know how or where to start. THings are about to change, at least i think- i'm trying here. NOTES FROM YOUR FAITHFUL READERS! I don't think you're that stupid if you could figure out that what you're doing is wrong. I have no idea what's going on in your life, but I honestly hope that everything gets better with your mom. Also, good luck with everything =) [*Kaser12*] HEy chad thanks for everything this weekend. You are a great friend- love ya guy, j rube i got ur santa cruz sweatshirt still, hehe. p.s. Wut u did 4 me was so awesome this weekend. W/o all that support I have no idea how I would have gotton thru these past few days. Thanks for listening to all my little problems, even tho they are nothing compared to what u r going thro. u r a true friend chad barker.& tell ur dad thank u 2 for letting me stay over,he is THE COOLEST DAD EVER.thank monica 2 for giving the best advice ever. your NOT stupid hun. sometimes we all need a little break from our problems. (part of y i'm coming out to Cali this summer. that & i just HAVE to hang out w/the COOLEST GUY IN THE WORLD! :-D hehe). dont beat yourself up sweetie, we all do thing's we're not proud of :-/ but hey, ur still loved :-D Love always, ~Lee~ Hey suga bunz, u did nothing wrong, you do so much and never seem to take time for yourself we all need a break sometimes... you shouldnt feel bad it doesnt mean anything bad, you have to keep yourself happy too and not always just everyone else's I know thats hard for you, mr.SELFLESS himself,You are the most awesome guy ever and that kinda dude aint selfish... i said so and i make the rules!~EvE sorry i'm stupid that kinda didnt make sense but u kno what i mean.... lol ~EvE Peace Out Skittle all i got to say eve is - thanks- and lay off the WEED- makes it hard for us to understand that writing. Just kidding bud. MUCH LOVE TO THE EVESTER! -chad LoL yea! i agree w/the Chadster! Hey Hey Hey! i get the 1st copy of Taste the Rainbow by Skittle! Singed by the Chadster, Evester and tha band! i knew u guys b4 u were famous! hehe. chad-i kept ALL them drunk & stoned pics u sent me :-D guess what's going on "Before they were rockstars!" and eve, i have pics of u too! hehe. "The Perfect Man" by Skittle off their debut album Taste the Rainbow :-D P.S. that last note is from me! ~Lee~ my stupid ass forgot to sign it, but then agian i ran out of characters hehe. gotta love me! laterz much, Lee LOL Chad dude ur the shit!!! Thanks so much for remembering me, dude that totally made my day.... shit my week! LOL Nice one too there buddy... u kno u understood me lol We're gonna party soooooooo hard sometime dude lol And Lee- you WISH you get a copy lol and leave those whore pics of me out of everything lol TASTE THE RAINBOW lol peace out gangsta ~Eve i know i don't know you all that well, but i'm sorry you're frustrated, i feel like that mojority of the time, and i'm getting tired of it, it's nice to see that you are putting an effort into changing something that you aren't happy with...i wish i could do that, but i am too selfish, maybe one of my friends just needs to smack me...oh well, ttyl. [christina1090] "all i got to say eve is - thanks- and lay off the WEED- makes it hard for us to understand that writing. Just kidding bud. MUCH LOVE TO THE EVESTER! -chad " LOL whatever u just like to be mean to me :( me no like lol nah I'm just playin u know I love ya! AND oh wow! LoL I wanted to say that cuz u left a note back lol dont ever forget me! LoL ~Eve