Hey... the past few days have been ok, not the best at all. I passed my reading class... YAY! All smiles there! Now I just have to wait till tomorrow and then I'm done! So happy about that. Only like 2 more weeks of school. I guess thats good. I'm really not to excited about the break though. I think I'm gonna take a class during winter term just to get away from everyone... not cause i want to, everything has just been weird lately. Last night, I went to Adriana's cousins Sweet 16! It was fun, i wish I had danced... I miss the old days. Well either way i was wearing heels and that wouldnt of worked. Me, Adan and Zach left cause they wanted to go to the strip club... I was gonna go but I backed out at the last minute! I ended up going to Nates and we drive around while he got high. Then we met up with Veronica and Danny and went looking for haunted placed in Dallas, it was kinda fun. Other then that, the past few days havent been the best. I think me and Nate are starting to talk less and less... I think it could just be me though. I really really need to stop liking him! Its just hurting me tooooo much! I mean, everyday I see him and I talk to him and think about what a great guy he is, and then I'm forced to remember its never gonna happen! Its getting to me so bad that I'm find myself crying about it like everyother night! I hate it! I started to diet again. Maybe he doesnt like me cause I'm fat! If thats the case, thats just sad. Either way, I'm tired of looking the way I do... and I might go to padre for spring break... and I'm NOT going like this. So yeah... i'm gonna try to lose 30 lbs, I've already lost 10 so it shouldnt be that hard. But I'm seriously gonna stick to it! no bullshit!! God I hate myself...