as if my life couldnt get any more boring... sometimes i feel like i dont belong anywhere... sometimes i feel like everythings my fault... if only that special someone would come and save me from all this horror, and take me to a place where all my worries have disappeared and nothing is leaning on my shoulders anymore... if only what i could feel was real... and if only what i want was mine... my life wouldnt b so boring or dull if everything would go better than it is now...... i have no father figure to look up to, and my mother is all i got, besides my friends that i adore, they arent always there for me when i need them... sure i can give my boyfriend a call, but when u hear that he cut himself 4 times, it hurts and makes u not want to hear it again... i believe him when he says he wont do it anymore, but for some ppl promises dont last very long so i just dont kno what to think anymore...... with all my love that i give to u, in hopes that you will give it back, i feel that you make my life complete, and each and every minute that im not with u, i wonder if u think of me...... with a jackass of a step dad and a father thats never around, an over-protective uncle, a depressed, suicidle brother, and best friends who arent the best, u'd think that i would turn out to b as bad as them... i try to hold on for this long bumpy ride, but sometimes i just want to give up and end it all right now, i fight and fight and fight it and that one person appears in my head and then i forget about all my problems and i feel relieved... when i look in his eyes i c heaven as if it were meant to b, all my troubles go away and i never want to leave him... lifes a bitch sometimes but no matter what the issue, i have the strength because of the one and only person i truly love with all of my heart, and if i lost him, i dont kno wut i would do without him, and i dont even kno if i could survive... i will love you for the rest of my life ricky, and i hope u will too....