Its Been to long since i have been on here and said anything... its been to long since ive wrote anything

i think im getting retarded in the head

its been forever since ive done any drugs

but i did get drug tested at work!

i love my bar :0

i think im paranoid i have all this worry bullshit

i just need to have more fun

stop and remember why im in love with rachel

and pute a smile on my own dam face

everything is going good

got the job

no more graves

i get to spend time with rae

every night i get to snuggle with her

i dont know what it is but lately i just havent wanted to have sex either

like the last couple months

we did lose the baby 3 months ago

freaked me out

im so worried that we might not be able to have kids

i think she thinks i dont want kids cuz im all sexually bleh

why?

shes so fuckin hot

amazing in bed

i need to get my head out of my ass and in to hers

... lol

i think its all the winter

its so cold

ive been so tierd and wore out

im ready for a vacation

shes at a friends house tonight

i really miss her

i want to make things right

sometimes i just get freaked out

i just cant speak

i dont talk to anyone

but im workin on that right here

or at least i think so

i know im happy

i just need to step back and look at things

and remember that i have freinds

a family

a soon to be wife

cuz i am ready

just broke lol

a cute but destructive new puppy

i think thats good

i think im good

i think im better

im ok now

im better then ok

im in love

rae does pute a smile on my face even when the last thing on my mind is smiling

dam i love her

shes doin so good