Damn i miss her.i never realized how much i took her love for granted.i've made alot of false promises so whats the point when noone believes you.i miss her smile.The smell of her skin and her blazing eyes from our dreams of the future.i want to belive we will get back together and i tell myself that every day but i can't help but think that in the end it won't be her choice.i brung this all on myself,all this turmoil.i miss her touch,her hands.i'm sitting here waiting for her to call back and i have a feeling she won't.she won't.i love you veronica,no matter what anyone says remember in the end i will always love YOU.I never in my life felt so close and so far away too someone as i did that day in newharmony.but that day i realized everything is worth giving up if i could just have you back.just for a little w hile.it's 10:01.no phone call.i cry s much now and i hardly ever have since the passing of my grandfather when i was 12.it hurts so much.i want to make it go away but i can't not that way...that makes it worse.i can't retreat back to old habit's and it's so hard when your all alone with only your mind stopping you.Well right now my mind is saying it dosen't want to be stopped...no, will-power,will power is the key.i guess only time will tell but who will tell the time?i've had enough.i'm going to force myself into another panick attack like i used too if i don't calm down.i can almost taste it.but i won't.not to her never again.