I'm so unhappy but i dont know why, i'm really exhausted & keep getting hot and cold flushes and feel dodgy too. At church i was really off with caroline and was trying to avoid her, but i don't know why i should, she aint done anything wrong to upset me, and she's my friend so why do i want to keep away from her? Normally i'm glad to see her & want to talk to her & i did yesterday when thinking about today. Becky noticed something was wrong but i couldn't talk to her. I don't know, i just want to be on my own and to cry but i won't let myself cry. I think maybe its got something to do with boyfriends, Becky's so happy with Adam, and her mom didnt even mind him being round during the week when they were away, partly cos Caroline convinced her it'd be alright; see if i had a boyfriend then i wouldn't ever be able to have him round, and any debates with my mum i'd have to sort myself cos i aint got no one to stand up for me cos mum dont have any friends like that, damn.