ahh things seem to be getting a bit better on the chris front. we spent monday morning messing around, him tickling me & throwing me around, was fun, then he gave me the letter, it was scary, he wanted me to act something out, but i knew it was wrong so ignored him when he came back & then he was all concerned & asking what was up & i told him & he was fine about me not wanting to do it & all apologetic saying it was wrong of him, bless. then later he told me he had strong feelings for me, that buggered me up a bit, but after much painful thinking & descusions & arguments with friends i ended up deciding/knowing that it wouldnt be right for me to go out with him, we can only be friends & once i'd emailed him a fairly long email about it & stating that i felt so much better & relaxed about things, its great & shows that its the right thing. by email we have quite deep conversations, and it brings out his caring side & also i've realised he's an insecure boy, not many people see that cos he rarely shows it, but it means i see him in a different way from all my friends which can make it hard on me, but i have tom, he's great, he can see it too, but may friends dont see how i'm such good mates with him either, never mind, its their loss. the sun is shining, i've had a shower & i feel good! lunchtime i guess, even tho i havent eaten lunch most of this week. o before i go, i must say that this all down to the wonderful God who is my bestest friend & guardian, without him i wouldnt be feeling so good, so praise the Lord!!!