I need somebody so badly, I am such a fucking loser, oh well I will always be that way I guess. I did something I really regret today, while at the movies, luckily Kady was there to help me, but Sylvia would have I think if she had known but she was with mike, I hope she is happy. I thank god Kady was there though....... she helped a lot. I felt so wierd all day, I felt nevermind I dont want to talk about it I am just being stupid as usual. I really really need to do something but I dont want to and its hard, not physically though. I now know of three people who know about something personal to me.....and well nevermind I am going to shut the fuck up I'm sure people have better things to do than listen to my pathetic whinings.