I never thought I'd truly see the day when it snowed so late in March. It's 11:11 p.m. -- and I wish I was with Jake. But God has performed another miracle -- and my dearest Jake... he has snow for the first time in a year. More than a year. It last snowed on March 2, 2005. I remember the day fondly. And as much as I wanted to believe it, I didn't really truly believe it was to snow this evening. God surprises me always. He's so great at that. I love Him. I am in awe of Him. I am repeatedly and continuously amazed by him. I just really don't want to go to school tomorrow, but you've got to do what you've got to do. There is absolutely no way of circumventing. The snow. The white blanket of pure chilled delight. It clings to the newborn grass and buds and shuns the tarred roads. Am I wishing for danger? Am I wanting that against God's will? What will happen will ultimately happen, this is a given. The inevitabilty of tomorrow will occur, whether I want it or not. But oh a day off. Before everything becomes entirely too hectic. Again. I will just breathe. The cold air is sneaking through my window... shirking beneath my sheets and lying with me through the night. What an agenda. I don't know if to resist or to welcome. I'm not ready for a new season, but I'll get over that. I called Jake this evening after he informed me he would like to speak with me on the phone. He removed himself from the car and stared at me through the window... I opened the door while recognizing his gestures for me to roll down the window. I make things ever so complicated. I think it's funny. He hugged me goodnight and inquired the best time to make a telephone call to my homestead. I decided I would just call him. It makes me feel kind of nice to acknowledge the fact that he talk to me in the evenings... that he requests to utilize the telephone. We could very easily just not talk and refuse our simple and convenient forms of communication to which we earlier did not properly take advantage. I'm glad of our relationship... its current place. I did become a bit irritated with him for a moment, but that was due to mocking and retaliation, it happens, we let it go. He did not let go of my arm -- and cue the flashbacks. Yes. So we addressed a few simple issues on the phone. I think I hate ear sweat. I'll be honest. It's disgusting. The disadvantage is that I'm slightly less able to hear in my right ear, so I can't switch ears so much. I had never noticed. That's a lie. I have. It really just makes me all flustered. Mehh. Nothing the Lord couldn't take care of. Yes. Ended with preposition. My oh my, an english teacher would tear this apart on grammar alone. My sentence structure is horrendous. Let's hear it for fragments. But what can one generate with these short thoughts? Incomplete : the story of me. It will get better. My teeth feel like they are moving, but only the back teeth. It will be okay. I think braces are ugly. I would really heavily enjoy to look a bit more of my age. Or you know... atleast 15. Anyway, I miss Jake majority of my day. Most of my day is thinking about him. I think I would like to pray for him more. Now that he is home... all I want to do is just... be around him. I want to be more of an avid visitor to quiet time and talking with God. No offense. I have very nearly actually REALLY failed at conducting quiet time in my mornings. I truly believe that it would be a good thing to have... these nights just aren't cutting it. I shared some stuff with Jake. I enjoy speaking spiritually with him... encompassing and approaching issues or questions. I think we challenged one another well, tonight. I'm trying to figure out why I like him... I mean, he isn't particularly amazing at what I am usually attracted to... his mental capacity isn't exceptionally large, he isn't so profound, he isn't mild-mannered, he smells a bit, he isn't overly opinionated, and he is so laid back that one could mistake it for being passive. He isn't an exact opposite, but just different enough that I am wildly intrigued by him. Yes, Wildly. There is something that catches me about him. He is so living for God. I respect that. I love that. I appreciate that. I am proud of that. He is so patient with me. I don't understand it. He likes me in return. I want to know why. He is pleasant and wants to please. I can't recall a time where I have. He is silly. I am silly. Maybe even deserving of the -ier form. I said it. He makes me laugh. Even out of pure discomfort, I can find something about him that makes me smile. Nervous laughing is still joy to me. He is very gentle with me. There are these moments that he slowly and so precisely sweeps my bangs from my eyes and places them behind my ears. I hate my hair behind my ears, but I love when he does that. I just want to look up at him and say, "I still think you are perfect." He knows his own boundaries. I like how he is conscious of mine as well, and very mindful of being respectful and pure. I still want to kiss him. But I don't. There is so many more things about him that make it so incredibly worth it. There's a little over a month until one year. I still cannot believe it. Six he has been away. Six we have endured as a long-distance relationship. That is a long time to be away. But it was good. I wouldn't have grown as much. It helped. I'm tired. Out.