i'm gunna have to see if i can remember where i left off here; it's been...as usual...quite some time since i've written. it is honestly due to being busy; since i've got a bit of time off of work, i suppose i shouldn't be lazy now. i'll try to section this off: the wedding is approaching so freaking fast, i cannot believe it: a month and some odd days. what happened to it being, like, eight months? dannnnnnng. almost everything is taken care of, save marriage licence (which is only good for thirty days as is so must be put off) and paying for a few final bits (which typically are done at the wedding, with the exception of my dress which is being altered becaaaaaaaaause.....of the next thing on my list to mention). the flowers are ordered and will look awesome; the cake design is finalised and will look awesome; my dress is being worked on and will look awesome; all of the things i've been worrying over pretty much are handled. there are a few odds-&-ends, of course, but i'm confident everything will be sorted as best as humans can sort. i'm expecting a glitch or two, so i'm faring pretty well presently. second list-thing: my weight. i've lost 40 lbs / 18+kg since july and have no intention of stopping; it's longggg overdue. it's not -for- the wedding specifically, though that's a nice byproduct; i just got sick of weighing double what i should and decided to finally kick my arse in gear. i've been counting calories (it's not that bad, honestly) and trying to walk & exercise as much as i'm able without over-doing it. drinking primarily water also, which also helps. it's been an interesting journey and not always easy, but i've been overweight my whole life and am sick of it. so the photos in my header are new (yes, i'm really that.pale.) and i'll post something for comparison: at the globe theatre, london, on my birthday - 19 april 2008: about a month later, visiting a friend in the netherlands: (^i don't have any pictures of me from the rest of the year, unfortunately) and then a few days ago on 1 oct 2009: i may be geeking out (specs instead of contacts due to eyes hurting, and my face is at an odd angle), but at least i'm getting somewhere. i've still plenty of progress to be made, but i've (for once) no doubt i'll reach my goal. i've kept this going much longer than i've done any other attempts; and this is more of a lifestyle change, which better suits than a crap 'diet.' it also feels really cool to have a figure other than 'sack' for once. ;) third thing: i've been writing poems again for the first time in years. with the exception of an extraneous three in 2006, i've not written regularly since 2004 and prior; there's a long story behind why i've started again (okay, not that long, just not in the mood to waffle on it), but it's positive and i'm really glad to have taken it up again. i hope the content has improved since i've last done, but i will say it's different at least. i'm hoping to get enough going that i can publish a book & i've got a few avenues to explore with this. we shall see what transpires. i've got plans for this eve and have spent today being lazyyyyy, so i suppose it's about time to make myself presentable. hope you're all well in internetland. ;)