had a right heap of tests yesterday at the doc (they got back to me after all) & am hoping i am now much closer to results. i had, among other things, an EKG done; due to COVID, the equipment was brought to my room, & it went much differently than EKGs have for me in the past. i basically ended up flashing the worker, who couldn't have been more than 25 years old, for 10 min straight. handsome kid, and possibly the son of my mum's new best friend...oi. i am not remotely prone to exhibitionism on even my best days, so that was a lot of awkwardness. he was extremely friendly; however, in an odd way, i think that might have made it worse.

still off of work for now - at least through the week. Election Day is next week [cue scary music], so if my sickness doesn't improve by then, i really hope at least i'll be able to celebrate a Biden-Harris win. we all need to end this awful year on a good note, & more Trump is about as bad as it could get. i cannot even imagine the damage he is capable of doing with four more years when he has absolutely -nothing- to lose.

politics are such a polarising topic these days, and i probably should avoid bringing them up altogether. it's difficult when they play such a huge role in life here, though.

in the States, & possibly on a global scale, the divide only grows: the basic spectrum in the States has shifted much to the right, especially after Regan (though i suspect it began with the mass exodus of Southern Dems to the Republican Party in the '60s, when liberals/progressives were in favour of Civil Rights & desegregation and conservatives were not), so even moderate conservatives (Hillary) are misidentified as being part of 'the radical left'. someone like Bernie Sanders is widely considered a 'far left' politician - when, in actuality he is, historically speaking, a mid-level Democrat. everything is so skewed here, & facts have become a novelty (often, a derided one!), so it's not surprising the country seems divided. historically, all great powers fall eventually; it's a shame humans haven't figured out the right way to co-exist by now.

ANYWAY. enough about that.

it snowed here on Sunday, and though it's early, i am happy it did. everything was gone by Monday arvo, but snow is magical, and i was needing the emotional boost after everything. the holidays are coming, and im excited! we always get an early start decorating for Christmas (usually, we set up on 1 Nov or at the first November week-end), and it still passes so quickly. i definitely met my match with John; my own tradition was to set up over Black Friday week-end (i stay home because it's too people-y out there!), but he is even more keen!

which is not a complaint, i must add; i actually love it.

a surprise just arrived: my air swing-walk fitness equipment! due to my disability, & especially now with having been extra poorly, ive had a tough time getting active again. where i live, it gets too cold for 'sane' people to want to walk outside; and i don't like going by myself, even though i love winter walks. pavements are hell on my joints, and ive wanted a machine like this ever since i was a kid & my mum had one. she ultimately binned hers cos she never used it, & i wasn't old enough for her to have the patience of saving it for me upon moving out, so it's been up to me to get one again. now ive finally got a little money, i went for it; poor health has a high price tag, so i feel it's worth the investment. even if im skint again, haha.

John's going to help me set it up when he wakes from his kip (he's not feeling well these days, either), & im excited to use it! i know it'll be extremely slow to start, but im hopeful it'll help my recovery as long as i don't overdo it.

on a fun note, ive managed to acquire two items from my 'Some Day' list in the past year-and-a-half: my Smart car, & now my Gazelle. id say im doing pretty well, all things considered. ( 8

even though my health isn't good at the moment, & i am frustrated by America's political climate, i do still have a lot of great things in my life. we can pay our bills without too much trouble (it's tight some months, but we make it work); i have a wonderful partner who brings joy & laughter to my life; i have a sweet, loyal dog and a seemingly immortal cat (he's aged 14 but still acts like a kitten!); i have a home we are steadily improving; and i have great friends & support.

what more could a person truly need in life? i am very lucky - and i know it. ( 8

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