So maybe it's just me, but I feel like I'm going to end up being treated like Tilicia was when this is all over. Yup. Lemme fill you in.
Earlier this week, Zach put some comments in his buddy info about two other girls. With the first one, I was like "Okay...well, whatever" and I let it go. But when the second comment about another girl showed up, I was kinda upset about it. I thought he was trying to get back at me, or prove something to me. So, that night, I asked him about it, and he said that those girls told him to do that. No offense but I thought that was really lame. If he really wanted me back, he would've known I do not like that, and wouldn't have done it. So whatever about that. It kind of pushed me way over the edge.
Then, by Thursday, we had talked it over and during lunch I think, he put his jacket back in my locker with a note in the jacket asking me back out. I had earlier realized I didn't wanna be involved with him again, because of the buddy info thing. He had lots of girlfriends while we dated, and after we broke up, so how am I supposed to think things would've been any different had we gone back out. He would've had to prove that to me. Well, today I went back and put the jacket back in his locker with a note saying sorry. And maybe it was just me but he got a real attitude with me. He didn't hold the doors for me on the way to class. So, yeah if that's how he wants to treat the situation then I'll no longer be nice about it either.
Well, I'm going to wait this next situation out to get the details before I ask him about it, but Maggie called me up and told me to call her back because there was something happening I'd probably get mad about. Well, I called her back and she told me Nick asked Hannah what she thought of Zach. But then Zach said Nick was being dumb. I really don't know what to think because I don't know the details, but that's how it happened with me and Tilicia. Nick asked us that before Zach would show interest. And why would Nick kid about something like that? I don't think Zach would be that low, but I could be wrong. I dunno, but if Nick was trying to start something yeah I'd be a little upset with him over that. But Maggie's gonna call me later about it, so I'll figure it out then.
Part of me if kind of defensive because I feel like Zach's going to end up treating me just like he did Tilicia. Even though he said he woulnd't. I dunno, but I do think, that if he wanted, and still wants me bad enough he'll prove all of my thoughts wrong. I'm not going to change how I feel unless I feel like things are different with him.
Right now, I'm just fine with things. I don't have peace about going back out with him. And until I do, I'm not worrying about it. I'm pretty much enjoying catching back up with my buddies, having time to myself, writing again and drawing too. It's all whatever though. I'm taking care of myself now. Tomorrow I'm hanging out with my youth group and we're going to a youth rally. Then we're gonna crash at Taylor's to play guitar hero and do whatever. Depends on how things go, we might just end up all sleeping at his place haha. Otherwise, they're all spending the night at my house. I can't wait just to be with my church. When I'm with them, the fun never stops, and there's no drama. Anyways....I'm out for tonight..
>>Allie