It seems that this week I can do no right. I messed up big time with my two best friends. I get yelled at my father about 3 times. And I got one of hes in your face being an ass and a mother fucker. I want to leave to go some were else but, were? I don't have eney place to go. I can't even talk to either of my best friends cause there both gone. & one of them isn't speaking to me. Great great ya, I know. My dad's g.f is an evil suckubass who is slowing sucking away every thing that i call fun and hold dear. I'd love to have to prist put holy water on her. She would burst into flames. Also she bitched out my father about me so that made him and even bigger ass cause she had already chewed up his for dinner. I swear I don't a life. i went to the local roller ring to take my mind off of things. Well i have roumatoid arithious. ya I know spelled wrong. Eney ways it means I have to take plenty of breaks. Well it was wet cause it has been raining off and on all day. i have the arithouis is all of my joints. So basicaly I couldn't roller blade for long before having to sit down from the pain. Fun let me tell you. That & as soon as I started roller blading I felt guilty from every thing i'd done all week. Though it was un-intional. So I didn't realy want to see Steph's lil. sis how was there. Only cause she is a link to stephanie and I was trying to take my mind off of that along with every thing else associated with my life. Which is kinda hard but, i had no shuch luck. I'm tired it's 12:42 am. I need to get some sleep but, right now this is more imoportant. I'm hoping Stephanie and Jill see this. I don't want to go throw it again on Monday. Though I'm not lazy. I just will probly for git certain details . That's why I'm doing this now while it's fresh in my head. I care for Jill and Stephanie. I vaule ther friend ship. I don't want to lose it. It seems as thow this week I can do no right. : ( .. : ( / I just wish I could find the words to aplogize to stephanie or at the very least get her to talk to me. The shit officaly hit the fan Monday. Yrp, it did. -Jess