you'd think from my last entry that i don't want to be friends with my lost friend stephanie. well i do. it's just that i'm admiting defeat. i should of done that a while ago. well it's just sunk in. i'm sure she dosn't want to be friends. i'm gonna quit fighting a losimg battle. cut my loses even if it feels like i'm cutting out a bit of my heart. it hurts and inside i don't want to do it. but, it makes the most sense. it's the most logical thing i can do. i mean it could be worse. i could of lost Stephanie AND Jill. Jill is great. eventualy i'll get over it. it will take some time but, eventualy i will..........i hope. i mean if she didn't want this she would of said some thing. done something to get my attion. so here i am. typing about the very person i'd rather not think about.