I finaly know what I did to my friend. I don't want to think about it. I spent all day Monday reamber why I said, what I did. I was sooo mean. I feel numb right now among alot other things. I hope I can get on msn tonight. I want to talk to my friend jill. just so that I lisen to a voice of reason. well she may not seem like reason to eney body. but, to me she is. she is my voice of reason when i have a million feelings. espcialy when i'm having a panic attack. she dosn't know this but, she will soon. it's not so much that she is reason. she helps me forget about stuff usualy by making me laugh. i don't usualy laugh on the outside on the inside i'm having a laughing fit. well not all the time. well gtg. lunch is over.