i'm dense. Frist off the topic i hate this. How ever said I was a chiken and runing from my problems. Your right. My friend Jill told me that more or less today and it's sunk in. Allso I don't want to be like my mom. I mean she was a good person. Very loving and had a hunger for knownledge. In those repespects I want to be like her. but, I don't want to make the same mistake she made. The last one she ever made. I allso have figured out another reason why my friend Jill and Stephanie are mad at me. I didn't trust them enough to open up to them about some soo serious. I though that telling them was a bad idea. Well that's were I went wrong. There my friends and they want to hear that kind of stuff to help me through it. I'm just too dense to relize that and opening up to them shouldn't be hard. I mean they have told me lots of deep and stuff. I know sorry dosn't cut it eney more but, I am.